Bike Crazy Slack Jawed Rants of Lust & Obsession

I know most folks are still in the midst of a season of some sorts. Cross is on the minds of many of my brothers and sisters, and others still have and endurance race or two left in them. Many others are out dodging rattle snakes with gal pals and enjoying fall riding. I still have a few good rides left in me, but of course we all know I've been slowed down temporarily by that thing that I swore I would not mention here on the Chamois for a while. With the cut in ride hours and too much time on my hands I have a raging case of the virus known as Velo Lust Syndrome™ or V.L.S.. I also seem to be fighting off the onset of Race Schedule Obsessive Compulsive Disorder™ or R.S.O.C.D..

I'll start with the 2nd of these two illnesses. R.S.O.C.D. has me obsessing about what kinds of races I want to do in 2009. Given my recent health issues (which I'm not gonna talk about) I think I may be done putting myself through 24 hour solos. I'm not ruling out a 12 or 13 hour Solo or a Duo or something, but it's just not worth it anymore. I've done a shit load. That's enough. I have no real urge to do too much XC. I do need to do some though. I think it will help me get faster. And I have to get the XC race monkey that is Don P. off my back!

My real urge is to do more marathons and hundies. They just speak to me more. Always have. It's more controled adventure. I think they're a blast and they give me what I want out of racing, which is to push myself and feel enjoy the sense of accomplishment that comes with finishing such a race. Plus I can get it done (most likely) within a reasonable time limit (under 10 hours) and hopefully NOT have to spend a month recovering from health issues brought on from the race.

So the tentative plan is to focus on five or so races in the N.U.E. Series, M.A.S.S. Marathons (trying to avoid the lap races) and one or two in the W.V.M.B.A. Ultra Series. I of course also really want to do a lot of training/underground "racing" in our mountains as I've discussed in the past. The hard thing with these races is the travel. I hope that over the winter and spring I can come up with a cheap, yet comfortable travel plan to get to these races. I'll be looking to try to car pool and split hotel costs when possible with some like minded local peeps if possible.

OK, so I have my race plan sorta down, I can obsess about which bike/bikes I want to used. This is where it gets TOTALLY out of hand with the V.L.S. illness. I would love to get my back on a full squish for racing (to ease my back). I just can't find one light enough for what I want to do without going back to 26" wheels. Sadly there aren't many I fancy. There a couple from Cannondale, Rocky Mountain, I dig, but a 26" bike with too little suspension gives me about the same benefits of my Dos Niner. So I'm not sure I would bother. Plus I'm not sure my personality fits with those bikes. Maybe the Rocky Mountain. But finding a Rocky Mountain dealers in the States is not easy task. I'm not sure I want to give up my relationship with Salsa either. I really can't imagine straying from her spicy 29" bosom. Plus it's not easy, since it's sort of like a cult run by Minnesotan bike Zealots). :)

With my plan to do Marathons, Hundies and XC I think I already have a killer pair of bikes in the Dos Niner and the Mamasita. If ONE bike goes it will most likely be the Mamasita. It's replacement is a debatable. My Mamasita is freaking SEXY and fast! In fact the bikes is way faster than I am, which is part of the problem!

I really don't want to give her up. I want to keep her, BUT I'm also sort of shallow, and the one thing that is really bugging me about my Mamasita is the dent on the top tube. It poses NO structural problems but every time I look at the bike my eyes dart STRAIGHT for the dent on the top tube. It drives me loco!! I just feel so ghetto on it. That Reba's gotta go too. It's a pretty good fork, but not a great fork. See I told you I was shallow. But you knew that.

So what to replace it with? I like having two bikes in the house. I love my Dos Niner and I LOVE the fact that the 2009 Dos Niner is Silver (my fave bike color) and has been tweeked a bit to handle a 100mm fork better. Part of me wants to get the '09, do it up with lighter parts and MAYBE just MAYBE finally make the move to Stans (am I the only person still running tubes?). I would then use the Silver Dos Niner as my race bike. And the Orange Dos Niner as my everyday training bike.
But then there's another part of me that wants to track down a close out '08 Mamasita (ahem, cough, cough, Salsa? Bikeman?) or just wait and get a new red Mama , add a Fox fork to it (with the new remote lock out) and go back to being in a near constant state of Velosturbation® over my bikes. AND have the option for a fast ass hard tail for tamer courses.

There is a final option. In 2009 if Salsa tells me to piss off and Bikeman.com deems me too much of a doofuss (as most folks do). There would be the option sell one complete bike and use the coin to ease the purchase of a Ti soft tail. But I love having my two bikes and two Salsas! Why can't I be like 99% of the World's Male population and just obsess over porn and sports?? I'm cursed!! CURSED I tell you!!


This is where I am right now. Little riding, and lots of obsessing and it's only October!! It's going to be a llllllong off season. Whatever route I go I know I need to lighten up my race bike AND myself. I have a goal of loosing about 15 pounds off of ME by March and the goal of loosing some weight off my race bike by Race #1.

If you were able to follow this bike crazy slack jawed rant of lust and obsession, you are to be commended. I wrote this and I can't even follow the stream of conscience drivel that I just typed.

Later.