Strap On The FeedBag

So far this week has been all about laying around, drinking beer, eating bon-bons, smoking cigarettes and getting fat. OK, aside from a couple beers on Monday, that's a lie, but I haven't been riding either. Back to back weekends of racing that included one EPIC bonk, and one "get my ass to the finish fast BEFORE I bonk" semi-bonk, has my body thinking that a couple days of siting on my ass, working on the mag, and taking care of some bike business is just fine.

After 5 years of sitting in the basement I finally got Wifey's mountain bike in semi running shape, and then took it to Pro Bikes to have them get it the rest of the way. She's been after me for months to get it going, and I finally did it. Earning some much needed Crime Fighting points in the process. The final straw came a week ago when she wanted to ride the rail trail with B-Man and didn't have a bike. So she rented a bike and it was a f*cking HUFFY! Dear God! THAT did it! No wife of mine!!!

I'm having FeedBag lust...

It's the Mountain FeedBag from Epic Ride Research. It's a bag that straps easily to your bars/stem (see site for details) and allows easy access to gels, bars, camera, etc., I saw a dude at the Lumberjack 100 using one and thought that it looked like a great idea. But I had no idea what it was called. Then today I was reading through an article that I was putting together for XXC and the author mentioned using the Mountain FeedBag. One "what the f*ck?" and one Google search later- I'm now lusting said FeedBag. I think it would be great for long races like the The Wilderness 101 and such. Possibly allow me to not wear a pack, keep the weight off my back and stay a little fresher. Hope to get one ordered up in the future.

The Worst Summer Ever continues here in WPA with damp, humid, rainy weather being just about a daily occurance. I'm about ready to start gobbling handfuls of Vitamin D, anti depressants and browniers from that crazy hippie lady that works at the health food store. Jeeeezus!!! I do plan on getting out on the bike for a bit tomorrow in between rain showers though. Nothing hard, just some easy riding to keep the taint in shape.

Later.

The Wayne Ultra: WVMBA Ultra #2 Race Report

Sunday was race #2 in the West Virginia Mountain Bike Association's Ultra Series. You may remember the first was the Massanuten XXC race down in Virginia a few weeks ago. I didn't make it to that one, but the 45 mile Wayne Ultra SEEMED like a good way to jump right back into racing after last week's Lumberjack 100. I usually don't do races even two weeks from each other, let alone ONE week, but hey, I was gonna ride anyway, why not support a local Ultra series and help make sure that these races stick around.

Mid week I made the decision that I would head to Ohio on Sunday. Ohio? Yeah, I know, it's the WVMBA Ultra series and the first two races weren't even in West Virginia. The irony isn't lost on me, but believe me The Wayne (and from what I've read the Hoo-Ha!) is hard enough to garner entry into the WVMBA, a series that has the reputation of having some of the most challenging and well organized events on the east coast.

I would be heading over to Ohio with my teamates Don Powers and Tim "Little Ball of Hate" Carson. As well as "Stick"- A local messenger and friend of ours that would be racing the XXC on his full ridged fixie. (and finish 5th in his class!). If nothing else, the 2+ hour drive would be fun.

After all the normal register/number plate/dump out/lather up/chamois up/spin the legs stuff it was go time. The race started with a verrrrry slow controlled start for a couple miles on the road. Finally the motorcycle honked and peeled off, and it was game on! The fast guys took off and me and the rest of the pack upped the pace and spread out over the first big gravel/pavement climb to the single track.

The first section of single track started off well enough, and then the trail went DOWN hill fast (literally) with a tight switchback seemingly every 20 yards. EEESH! Add one marginally skilled mountain biker (me) on a big (although be it great) 29er and it was NOT a pretty site. It was about as smooth as dry humping a sandstone boulder (not that I've ever done that, but I'm sure SOMEBODY has, I almost guarantee you there's some "rocks on rocks" fetish forum out there). Anyway, I felt all over the place on the trail. At first I thought maybe I had too much PSI in my tires, but for someone my weight I think just under 30 is ok, then I thought that maybe I accidentally f*cked with the Fox's rebound. Nope. Here is turns out I was just having a suck day in the single track. Like the saying goes... "Excrement happens".

A mile or two later I saw Don on the side of the trail with a broken chain. I couldn't help him so I just motored on. He was lucky to have a dude hook him up with a power link and the next thing you knew he was back on the trail and passing me just a few miles later on his new red Mamasita. I also saw another teammate John M. and his new red Mamasita on the side of the trail with his chain all jammed up in his crank. Not sure what happen there, but I think it may have been a 1x9 drive train issue.

The trail ahead continued with the normal type of river valley type riding. Roll along a moist/muddy creek bed, climb up on some off camber, switch back filled single track and then bomb down some steep single track. There were some folks just railing this course. While I wasn't one of them, it was fun to watch. The Wayne course was fun, but about 100% different from last week's Lumberjack 100 course. This course made you work hard and indeed was ULTRA. There were a few stretches of road and gravel that I welcomed, so as to stretch out a bit, relax and try to make up for the single track skills that I guess I forgot to bring with me.

At about mile 30 I was starting to slow big time, but just kept plugging along. Before you knew it were doubling back on some of the course. Then it got just f*cking silly, and they had us going up the STEEP down hill from earlier in the course. It was hike a bike all the way. For EVERYONE! It was the steepest hike a bike I've ever done. There is a steep one in the Mohican 100, but this one was WAY steeper. Traction was hard to get, the dirt was damp, and I found myself along with some others walking about 20 steps. Stopping, taking some deep breaths, sobbing all over my handle bars and then continuing. On top of that it was getting HUUUUUMID and I was just pouring sweat. I mean was SOAKED.

Once to the top of the hike a bike it was few more sections of trail, and a road section from earlier in the race. I hoped.... scratch that, I prayed that the road would lead us to the finish. But I knew those prayers would not be answered due to the fact the race director told us that the race ended at the bottom of ANOTHER set of steep switchbacks. Oh well, keep on keeping on....

Finally, the switch backs! And I was spent. I had nothing to negotiate these switchbacks and on a couple I had to come to complete stand still to get around them, or risk sliding down the hill in a ball of my own spent suck.

One last little down hill and I hit the finish line, which was oddly located along a highway and about a mile from the start line. Glad to have that one done. Not sure if I would have really done any better had I had had more rest. My legs felt good for the most part, it was more a skills problem. I was just sketchy. Need to spend the next few weeks getting on some single track. The road is great for fitness, but the skillz are getting rusty. Need work!

I ended up finishing 19th of 30+ starters in my class with a time of 4:58 and 31st out of about 63 starters. So overall I preserved my mid pack domination, but relegated to the back of the mid pack in the Men's Open. HA!

I can't say enough about the WVMBA races. They pay out good and deep and just put on a great race. There were free foot long Subway Subs and drinks after the race and copious amounts of schwag given away. Results can be found HERE.

Time for a little endurance race/rest. Need to work on some skills, get some bike work done and get ready for the Wilderness 101 on August 1st.

Later.

Thanks to iPlayoutside.com for the image.

That One Hurt

Yikes! Nothing like racing a 45 mile XXC race one week after a 100, on some borrowed marginal talent that I'm seemingly paying back at a STEEP interest rate. In other words, the Wayne Ultra threw me a Grade "A" beat down, but it still felt oddly arousing, I mean good.

Time for a little mid summer break from the races, and some sleep. I will sleep hard, but will probably be having nightmares about those fiendish switch backs. Then again, maybe I'll have nightmares about the sick & slick off camber sections, rocks, long climbs, humidity, and one, giant, cry on my bars hike a bike. Good stuff.

Race report n'at to come.

Later.

Hop Hog Friday

I had a nice Friday a.m. ride today. Things were humid. I'm talking open your mouth and suck down a pint of water, sweat it right out type humidity. The gray index was up to 40% today and the temps, although still warm, were much cooler than yesterday.

For the most part the legs were happy to be out and about. Not sure if I would call them "race ready" by any stretch of my demented imagination, but to quote the soccer moms and McCubical philosophers- "it is what it is". I still don't know what that means. I guess it's better than saying "nothing I can f*cking do about it". Although I would feel slightly better (that's not saying much) about myself saying N.I.C.F.D.A.I. rather than I.I.W.I.I. any day. But hey, that's just me.

B-Man has been invited to hang out with his Aunt Jenny and Uncle Joe tonight, so Wifey and I are heading to Mad Mex to enjoy a few beers and at least 1/2 of an adult conversation, as well as some yummy Mexican food. This will make 5 of 6 nights with me eating Mexican this week. GODDAMN I love that shit! Not to mention it cleans me right out! F*ck Fiber One, give me a Chic Pea Chili Burrito with extra peppers and onions.
Right now I'm enjoying a Lancaster Brewing Hop Hog. Not as good as Sierra Nevada's Torpedo, but still a damn fine beer and a PA brewer. So you gotz to back 'em. Time to go Hoggin' and get my grub on at Mad Mex.

Later.

Taking It Easy In Prep To Not

Spent most of today a slave to my Scion dealer's service center. Waiting for them to call, me calling them, waiting for them to call them back and then them FINALLY saying the xB was good to go. Glad to have it back. And that whole water in the car thing taken care of.

Didn't make it out for a ride. Wifey's gym night combined with B-Man not thrilled with the idea of hanging at the gym baby sitting and me not thrilled with the prospect of 90 degree afternoon heat and a chance for severe evening thunderstorms. The heat I could have dealt with (better than too cold!) but I figured tomorrow a.m.'s ride will come soon enough and I am sort of doing some unusual whack job (for me) recovery week stuff by planning to race again on Sunday in the form of a 45 mile XXC race. Usually I go at least a few weeks in between long races (now deemed rides), but figure "what the frig?", there's always next week to take it easy.

Looks like we're about to get slapped in the ballz with heavy T-Storms, so the trails will be off limits tomorrow. So looks like time on the road. No big, it's been a weeks since I saw pavement, so I guess I'm ready.

Time to go ready or something. Probably "or something".

Later.

Limestone Rolling With Lemmy

CURSE YOU VILE PLUGGED UP Xb A/C, CURSE YOU!

Still no Xb. I continue to get my grandpa on with the bike rackless rental Toyota sedan. Frig. The B is supposed to be done in the a.m., but I won't hold my breath. To their credit they're drying out the interior, carpet and all that shit too, and I'm not paying a dime, so rock on Mr. Scion Mechanic Dude. Rock on.

I was still able to get a quick ride in this evening. Who knew you could fit a Dos Niner in the back of a Scion Xa hatch? She took it like a champ! From the outside I think the Dos Niner is bigger than the "A". Anyway, the ride... I just wanted something quick and to zone out, get the legs moving and ease back into my ride schedule so I can save something for Sunday's WVMBA Wayne Ultra.

So I loaded up the iPod with some newly acquired Motorhead and went to the rail trail to dodge snakes, shirtless old men on cruisers and the women who love them. Motorhead? Yeah, metal. Not sure what got into me. I think I've been hanging around Schmalzer too much.

Back in the late 80s, early 90s, I use to be the kind of guy that could listen to Morrissey and Iron Maiden in the same mix tape. Then I discovered how stupid most metal was. But in the past few weeks I realized that sometime I just want BIG, dumb rock. So I've been listening to a lot of big dumb indy rock and guitar rock like Dinosaur Jr., The White Stripes, Oasis, Eagles of Death Metal, and now Motorhead.

All Motorhead songs are basically the same fast beat, with Lemmy wailing on about cars, war, fighting, chicks, booze, and going fast. While I won't be dawning any leather wrist bands or torn acid washed nut hugging jeans anytime soon, I do have to say that the album Motorizer cooks. If fast big and dumb is what you want. It's got plenty. And that's a good thing.

So off I went with an iPod mix of Motorhead and a saddle full of my ass. It felt so good to spin the legs and put in some time. I only rode for 1:45, but the high cadence and constant pedaling really blew the funk out of my legs and my brain. I saw a couple snakes and rolled over one. Sorry snake. Better to run over you than that too tan, shirtless old dude with the white haired back that was coming at me. His body looked like beef jerkey covered in mold fuzz.

Gotta split. Got some words from the Hoo-Ha XXC that needs put together with a sweet pic that found its way to my e mail box today. Thanks JR.

Later.

On Hold

My riding and "training" has been on hold the past couple days. After my epic 4th lap bonk at the M-F-L'Jack I guess the body could use the break. Some of the break is self imposed the rest is thrust at me like turd under the nose due to my lack of a car with a roof rack. The Xb has a clogged A/C drain and was leaking water into the vehicle on the trip to Michigan. (Sorry about the wet foot Rob). The repair, etc, is all under warranty, and SHOULD be done tomorrow at some point. But in the mean time I've been forced to drive some lame Toyota sedan for the past day and a half. UG!

If I feel like braving the main roads, their busy traffic and Yinzers shouting obscenities I could venture out to get some road riding in. If not, Thursday will have to do. I think a couple days of light riding will be fine, since I'm 90% sure that I want to ride the 45 mile Wayne Ultra on Sunday.

I did spend some time today cleaning up the Dos Niner, getting the Michigan sand and grit out of the drive train and about 1 million bugs off my fork. They came off much easier than I thought. Nice to see the bike look repcetable again. Now the nuggets are aching to get back on her.

Later.

2009 Lumberjack 100 Race Report

Hard to believe the Lumberjack 100 is here and gone. It seems like just yesterday that I signed up for it. In reality it was several months ago when I got registered and just beat the 200 racer limit. I would be lying if I said that I wasn't nervous for this one. It was a long drive, to do a long race and in a different (for a 100 miler) format than I'm used to. And it would be all single track. That meant it would sorta be like what I envision heaven to be like. But it also had the potential to be a little bit like hell. In reality it was sort of like being in heaven but then getting caught with a stack of nudie books and being sent to do time in purgatory (something I pretty much imagine happening to me in the afterlife). This is how it went down....

In the weeks leading up to the Lumberjack, I started getting a bit on edge about my choice to enter a race this far away from home. But the entry was paid, I wanted to do it, and since we are in the midst of the W.S.E. (Worst Summer Ever) here in Western PA (weather wise) I figured it could be some time until my knobbies hit quality dirt. So I embraced the Lumberjack, which I re-dubbed the Mother F*cking Lumberjack, pack the car with with a bunch of bike shit, the Dos Niner, my friend Rob and his Niner and we headed to the top of the rust belt to race in some dirt.

The drive was long, but it could have been a lot worse. After about 8 hours on the nos we were at the Big M Ski Area, checked in and debating a small pre ride. My friend and what has turned out to be 2009 race partner Brad Schmalzer was driving up from his new digz in West Virginia and was about 20 minutes or so behind us. As we waited for Brad, Rob had some shoe issues (a Lake boa gone bad), light rain was moved in, and desire to pre ride, was sort of lost. We did talk to Speedgoat racer and would be single speed winner Gerry P. for a while and he gave us the low down on the course, we became content just to soak in some of that knowledge and head to the hotel down the road in Manistee.

After a nice dinner and a couple of Bell's Oberons, it was time for prepping the bottles, hydrating, and trying to sleep. After the long drive I was out like a light, but was up at 2 a.m. in a panic. "What the f*ck am I doing in Michigan??" "WHY am I racing my bike for 100 miles again??". "Oh man it's f*cking raining. HARD!". Finally I fell back asleep, but 4:30 came fast and before I knew it I was stuffing the lathered up bunz & boyz into spandex for 100 miles of Michigan single track.

Things were pretty wet from the rain during the night, but even from just tramping around the pit area you could tell that this Michigan sandy soil was MUCH different from the PA/WV mud that I'm used to. From all signs the rain looked to actually improve the course!

We lined up down the paved road and waited for the start. We chatted with some folks and proceeded to get sucked dry by mosquitoes. The start went way better than I anticipated. I pictured a real bottle neck, but the pack thinned out nicely on the road, We entered thee start/finish area and headed up a sandy hill. Things did back up a bit as 99% us hike a biked the climb on the first lap, but once at the top I settled in with some folks for some very sweet single track.

The course was fun and fast. The first lap had me grabbing a bit too much brake in the corners. This is were knowing the course would have helped. But I would have 3 more chances to get more acquainted with the 25 mile lap. I had a nice pace, and was doing my thing. The course was a freaking BLAST! There was climbing, but nothing long, and it was just beautiful in spots. One particular spot was fast (15 to 20 mph) twisty single track through tall ass pine. It was amazing. This is the part I started thinking this was heaven! Just freaking fast and fun dirt. There were parts that I was able to big ring it, stand, give my back a brake and use some different muscles.

I finished the first lap in 2:15. Stopped at the cooler along the trail swapped bottles, ate a gel and a 3 Musketeers bar and head out for lap 2. This time there was a way more room on the first climb so I just put in granny, found a line and spun up the hill. I spent a lot of lap 2 by myself. I was still having a blast and just going my own pace. I'd pass a rider here and there, leap frog with a couple folks, and just kept enjoying this course. Some of the downhills while not STEEP were FAST and I would be reach speeds in the mid 20s as trees wizzed by me.

I was feeling good about my pace and thought that I just might be finishing this one closer to 9 hours rather than closer to 10. I just kept focused on a steady pace, made sure I was taking in calories, and tried to stay hydrated. Lap 2 time: 2:18.

Again, I was in the pit to grab a couple bottles, take a couple Tylenol, and down a bar and gel. My times in the pit were only about one minute. I knew going in Lap 3 was gonna be tough. Sort of "no mans land". All I knew is that I wanted it over with, so I could get out for lap 4 and know the the final 25 before the DNF Demons began to pick at my brain.

I once again pedaled up the first climb, but this time I had to pull over at the top to wiz. I made it quick, and was thankful I was not like Rob who felt the need for a mid race dump in the wood. Yikes!

I tried to up the pace in the 3rd lap, and felt good. But it only took me about 8 miles to regret this decision. I found myself starting to really fatigue. My arms hurt, my legs hurt, my back hurt, and I was on the edge of cramping. Hadn't cramped but there was flashes of the legs wanting to seize up. So I backed off and was now using the granny to spin up hills that I was middle ringing and standing on the previous two laps. Still I manged to not fall TOO far off my pace and came in with a 2:25 lap time. Of course I DID get passed by the top 3 men (Schalk, Tanguy, and Eatough) on their LAST lap, like I was standing still at about the 20 mile mark of my THIRD lap. Freaks.

It was about 2 p.m. when I got in the pit. Got my shit and hurried back out. As soon as I hit the first climb I knew this one was gonna hurt. BAD! I didn't even waste the energy trying to ride the hill and pushed up. Go on and tried to make up a few seconds here and there. My goals was the aid station. Just get to the aid station, get some food, or some cold water and GET THE LAP DONE!

After about 3 miles I realized I was toast. Every bump made me want to puke. The water in my pack was as as warm as a trucker bomb on a July day and my bottles weren't much better. And EVERYTHING tasted like warm dog excrement.

I was bonking. HARD. The legs had no power at all. Nothing. Flats that I was big ringing at 15 mph before I was now spinning along at about 6. I was devastated. I knew I would finish. But how long would it take?? All that good mojo of laps 1 though 3 was gone. I kept it positive knowing I could finish, but I was in survival mode now. Something I really hadn't felt this year at all. This is the part where St. Peter busted me with the above mentioned stack of nudie books and sent me to do some time someplace "warmer".

It took me forever to reach the aid station. I had plans to grab something to eat, fill my bottles with cold water, maybe dump some cool water on myself to cool down, and salvage what I could of the lap. But when I got there I leaned my bike up against a tree, grabbed my bottle and just sort of stood there. I didn't eat anything, I didn't fill my bottle, and I didn't cool down. I drank 2 small cups of Coke and got back on my bike. WTF??

The next down hill I was traveling at about 15 mph. Zoned out, and found myself heading right for a tree. I grabbed giant, handfuls of brake and skidded and finally did a slow speed endo about 2 inches from the tree. Again I ask thee.... WTF?

My race goals were gone. The only things I could salvage on the lap would be not pulling the plug and finishing in under 10 hours. I finished the lap, stumbling, soft pedaling, and coasting. I managed to get in at the 9:42 mark, in 50th place out of 175 male starters and 83rd out of 272 overall. Happy to finish, and happy have had the chance to ride some incredible single track. But not happy to have been reduced to a stumbling goof again.

I by no means "compete" in these races. But finishing in such a way made me realize again that I am an endurance mountain bike RIDER, not a RACER. Will I stop doing the races? No. But I sure as hell won't be telling anyone I "race" bikes anytime soon. I ride bikes in races. Not that there's anything wrong with that, I just want to be honest with folks.

OK, now enough with all that end of the race report "woe is me" bullshit. Barring that last lap, the race was a blast. I have another NUE race under my belt, earned my Lumberjack 100 finishers patch, and had a great time with Brad and Rob (who both had excellent races, congrats!). If the race would have been the Lumberjack 75 I would have been gold! LOL!

Time to start thinking of the next race to ride, the Wilderness 101, and maybe even this coming weekend's Wayne Ultra?

Hope to snag some pics to spice up this report in the future.

Later.

M.F.L.J.

More later of course.

Later.

W.S.E. Day Two (It's better)

W.S.E (Worst Summer Ever) was in full effect today. Much of White Oak is still mopping up after last night's royal piss down of rain. We had a bit of water in the Stankment™, which will now make it 50% Stankier, for my winter training pleasure. It looked like down in one part of town they had some major shit happen, with a small creek that went BIG on their asses resulting in mud and debris all over the place. I blame all the storm drains and drainage that is backed up with Wendy's cups, Dorito bags, and God knows what else. Good luck to them.


The skies were indeed gray (please refer to the W.S.E. Gray Day Chart above) and mud, stones and debris littered many roads, but remember the W.S.E. creed- Embrace The Suck! I mounted the Campeon and did my 30 mile loop, pushed some big gears and reminded the legs what the hell it feels like to put some power down. The sort of which I will need for a course like the M.F.L.J. (Mother F*cking Lumberjack).

The (brief) rain held off until I was finished with my ride, but even if it had rained, bring it on! I was in full on "embrace" mode. It felt so good to ride and open up the legs, after a week that saw little saddle time for my aging, flabby ass.

It was HUMID as the under carriage of a fat man in leather pants, and just as stanky. Remember the Carp Nut Sack comment, I made a while back? Well, now imagine the fat man in his leather pants, combined with some seriously humid weather, with said vile smelling Carp (and his sack) stuff in his crotchial regions. Go ahead, take a minute, immmmmmagine.... OK? Good.

I had a feeling I'd be seeing some reptile type critters on the road, with the high waters and flash floods of last night. Today's list was one live snake (small and not scary), one dead frog, and this fella...

He was NOT making good time across the road. I wanted to pick him up and help him, but I've read about these rare incurable skin diseases you can get from touching a turtle. Or was that fornicating with Brazilian prostitute? Either way, I left him to fend for himself. I was happy that on my return he was gone and made it across safely.

Mmmm, smell that muddy, nasty, water. The amount of disease in that water makes the above mentioned Brazilian prostitute seems like the Virgin Connie Swail.

The Muddy Carp Balls meets leather pants wearing Fat Man Balls humidity had me sweating like a pig. The Tifosi specs were littered with sweat and I think I spent half the ride riding cross eyed in an attempt to see! (As you see below, because I have no self respect whatsoever)

I'm starting to think that crossed eyes could only improve my "look".

As so often is the case, I can't blather on about BIG hours on the bike, power output, or high zoot bike shit, but I CAN find a way to blather on about a 2 hour ride. It's a curse. Really.

By this time tomorrow I will be atop the rust belt, in Michigan, probably drinking a beer, eating high carb, cheese slathered food, watching a bad movie with a couple of friends, including (of course) Mr. Brad Schmalzer (on guitar). I have yet to do a race in 2009 that I didn't find myself sharing a hotel room with Brad and a bunch of bikes the night before. WTF? Snotcycle, Camp Hilbert, Leesburg, Mohican and now the Lumberjack. I have had some good races this year (for me). Maybe Brad is like a good luck charm? What will I ever do if Brad doesn't come to a race with me??? MAMA!!!

In closing I have to mention again that the whole Worst Summer Ever thing is of course all in fun. There are a LOT of folks worse off than me out there. Of course this IS more important because it's about a perennial mid packer not having the chance to enjoy riding his bike, but you get the point. PLUS, LAST summer was the Worst Summer Ever! (Hyper extended thumb, bee sting/swollen hand, depression, strep throat, pink eye, a $350 DNF, and Deep Vein Thrombosis). So bring on the rain, the mud and the hundies! I can take it like a champ. Me and that Brazilian prostitute are not so different. Except for the paid sex with lots of strange men part.

Time to keep packing and get ready for 9 hours of driving in the a.m. followed by 100 miles of damp Michigan single track with 200 other freaks.

Next post on Sssssunday.

Later.

The W.S.E. Movement Starts Now!

Wifey's been all in my grill about the negative posts and attitude I've been giving off both in person and via the blog, and for this I apologize, but hey, I callz 'em like I seez 'em. And this is why I am about to take a negative, make a positive, and introduce you to The Soiled Chamois' Wost Summer Ever or W.S.E.

Our "official" poster...

Yeah, after a winter of freezing temps and shitty rides, it's time for the W.S.E.. Daily doses of lights on in the middle of the day, dark gray cloud cover, daily piss downs of rain and general malaise to take us right up until Labor Day and the official start of "Suck In Real Time".

What, you're not seeing the positive in this, are you?

See I will now EMBRACE the suck. Sun, warm temps and dry trails are the "new suck". I will ride in rain, I will blow through brake pads, I will rut up trails, I will get lost in a maze of thorny overgrowth. I will ride in the wet so much that my taint will look, feel and smell like a week old dish rag. I will spend hundreds of dollars replacing mud ruined bike parts. I will embrace my Vitamin D deficiency. I will most likely be back on antidepressants by this time next week, so enjoy W.S.E. now! LOL!

All this is joking of course. I mean it's only June 17th! I there's still hope that we could have a drought or something. Or that Wifey lands a job in New Mexico or Arizona. THAT would be titz!

So I will no longer bitch about the summer and it's suckness. I will embrace it. I will love it. (All lies)

OK, OK, enough of the fun with misery stuff. The ride was nixed due to a.m. down pours and p.m. storms and tornado watches. Frig. I guess there's always tomorrow. I spent most of my non B-Man time working on the mag and organizing for The L-Jack. Hope that my order of CytoCarb II comes in at GNC tomorrow or I'll have to go on a tri-state search for it. I also need to pick up some more of the best sports bars ever to fuel me for the Jack.

Speaking of the mag, got some contributions from a friend and standing XXC contributor today, that once again blew my mind. All I can say, is dude can take a picture! You'll have to look for the next issue in July to see the story and read the words. Thanks dude! You know who you are! No links, you'll get 'em in the mag!

Watched the Dark Night today. Damn, what a flick!! Best movie I've seen in a LLLONG time. I mean it was amazing. I can't believe how much I liked it! I was a borderline comic book nerd as a teen, and this is hands down the best comic movie I've seen. No cheezy sayings, no cheezy product placements, well acted, great effects, good story. I mean there were parts with the Joker had me all tensed up like I was watching a freaking horror movie. NOT A KIDS movie and I had to keep the fact that I had it in the house on the D.L. or the boy would have wanted in on it, but it is WAY too disturbing for any one under 12 IMO. Damn good though.

I ONCE again plan on riding tomorrow. Wait, hold on... I WILL ride tomorrow. EMBRACE THE SUCK.... EMBRACE THE SUCK.... EMBRACE THE SUCK....

Later.

Frustrated

I was anxious to get on the bike today, and to get back on dirt. I mentally scheduled in time with the Dos at Boyce Park for a couple hours this a.m.. Typical weekday- up, copious amounts of coffee, check e mail, get the boy up, eat, off to school, kit up and off to ride. Sadly as the a.m. went on I found myself less and less enthused to ride at Boyce. I blame an on again/off again summer funk that I've been in. But I went anyway.

The trails seemed pretty good. Couple of mud holes here and there, but nothing like my attempt last week. Then I started getting deeper into the single track. And the vegetation became thicker and thicker. Arms getting tore up from jaggerz, bitch slapped my some thick weeds, and in no way being able to see around corners. Boyce has become sort of a thorn (no pun intended) in my side this summer. I want dirt but it alternates between being a mud pool and now grown up with weeds and jaggerz.

My mind was so "out there" I found myself bypassing turns for parts of a loop I done in various ways for years! Sad thing was my legs felt great. Lungs felt great. My mind was just everywhere but the ride. I seriously felt like I was riding like a novice rider. Shit was just "off".

I aborted after an hour. I could have taken a few minutes and figured out a loop that would have ditched the heavy growth areas, but figured "f*ck it". I'll hit the road tomorrow in preps for this weekend's single track binge in Michigan. As much as I hate the road, I hate getting bitch slapped by thick ass weeds more! I of course want to get out to Boyce and cut back some growth, but of course you have to go through the "ask the county parks people, make sure this organization knows about it, make sure that organization knows about it, do it like this, not like that" stuff. When the single track at Boyce is on, it's some of the best suburban single track around. But right now the combination of my mind funk and the vegetation, has me eager to stay in the mountains, and on the race courses for a while. Luckily there is enough race time coming in the next couple weeks to keep my lust for dirt satiated. And afte that a nice stretch of nothing but racing and riding on my terms for about 3 or 4 weeks.

I never said I was deep, but I am profoundly shallow

My lack of knowledge is vast, and my horizons are narrow
I never said I was big, I never said that I was clever
And if you're waiting to find what's going on in my mind,
you could be waiting forever
Forever and ever
- "I never said I was deep", by Jarvis Cocker

For all the crap riding/mental funk I've been doing/having, I am VERY pleased with the way Issue #3 of XXC is taking shape. With each issue I'm finding myself better at letting go of the design "restrictions" that 16 years of newspaper ad design put on me. It feels good. Of course I actually got PAID to do the shit work. Hmmmm.

Time to de funk, listen to some more from Sir Jarvis, and get some rest. OK, get some rest.

Later.

The Sink Hole

Not much going on today. Lots of house stuff that I needed to catch up on and start. The disrepair of my home and yard is sort of like my financial debt. If I think about it I will become completely overwhelmed to the point of hyperventilation. BUT if I just plug along and never really look at my balance or in this case too closely around my home and yard, then I can live in semi/temporary/almost happiness.

So grass cutting and some slight hedge trimming would have to suffice for my "house work" contribution today. Beyond that my skills at maintaining a house are at the sub zero mark. I have a theory that there are three kinds of home owners- Those who "do the work themselves", those who "call someone who knows what he/she is doing" and those "who should be calling someone who knows what he/she is doing, but for some reason never picks up the phone and watches their house fall down around them". Yep, I'm the third one. But hey I got some sweet bikes!! :)

Only a few more days until the long road trip to Michigan and the L'Jack. Weather looks like it could be a factor with some rain and storms predicted right now. I've heard from some people who've raced it before that a little rain actually helps the course, but if we get rain like last year, it could suck. Long and hard. Like 100 miles long and like 100 miles in the rain and muck hard. Ah what do I care? Bring it on! Do you really want another lame race report, where all I talk about finishing a race in 60ish place and having a good time. NO! So lets spice it up with some shit weather and misery baby!

Anxious to get on the bike tomorrow and blow out some stress. Hope to get some dirt in. But hell at this point I'd settle for riding a tandem on the boardwalk of some trash and needle laden east coast beach.

Later.

Could Be Worse

Had a road ride scheduled today, but then Wifey mentioned that she wanted to take B-Man to a Pirate game. She knows that's not my bag (dealing with the public), and gave me the green light to go ride or do whatever I wanted. I chose to ride, and ride on the mountain. Nothing big, but I needed to get out of the hood for a bit.

Just before I left for the ride, I was seaching for my iPod. The 45 minute drive would be nice to give a listen to the variety of new tunes I recently got from Dinosaur Jr., The Crystal Method, Jarvis Cocker and Jason Lytyle (of the late Grandaddy). Well I searched everywhere. I even did a cavity search on Wifey in pursuit of said small electronic listening device. And while that was fun (and little messy) it turned up nothing! Next search- The washer. Yep, it was in the pocket of the shorts I had on yesterday after my ride. Frig!! 2+ bills down the drain.

As I sat in my office chair in amazement that my iPod was gone, B-Man comes up and says "Daddy, I know you're sad, so I think you should come downstairs and look at our bikes, because thinking about bikes makes you happy." That is so true B-Man. Thanks. But hey, it's just an iPod, no big. Not like a lost a f*cking arm.

Oh well, I'd have to go old school and listen to CDs or something. Ah... no! I luckily have a cd full of mp3 mixes that I keep in the Xb for emergencies. And the Xb's tuneage pumper outer plays mp3 cds. Joy. (sort of, I'm still out 2 f*cking bills!!!)

The weather was so freaking perfect. Warm, but not hot, and no humidity. It would have been the perfect day for an epic, but I have the L-Jack coming up next week so something 2 to 3 hours would be good enough for my sub-marginally talented ass.

I parked off Rt.31 and rode Fire Tower over to Seven Springs and rode the race course. This time I rode the whole course and not just the 75% I have been riding. Contrary to a previous post of mine the Philip Seymour Hoffman Memorial Rock Garden (so named by me) trail is open and rideable. Apparently the 60 to 70 laps that I have on the course was just NOT enough to remember the correct entrance into the trail, oh well, it's open, I rode it, but had to dab once and walk 20 feet. Frig.

As much as I love many of the new trails at Seven Springs, the debate is open on whether they will make for a good race course. Already longish lap times are gonna be longer if they use the trails, and may pose a problem for many racers on night laps. IFFFFFFFFFF I were to race it (doubtful), that would pose no real problem for me since I'm lucky to use the Princeton Tec SB3 and between my 2 batteries have over 12 hours of burn time. But for those who might have an HID that only has like 1:30 of burn time, and you're riding slow... there could be issues. Just saying. You could just ride faster, ride blind, OR buy a PTSB3! ;)

Saw few other folks out on the trails including some junior riders (10 to 13 years old) with what I presume was their fathers (or older brothers, or creepy old guys). It was nice to see folks out enjoying the single track, especially junior riders. I can't wait to introduce B-Man to the beauty of time in the saddle in the mountains.

The legs felt great, and I experienced that magical feeling of feeling like I could toss the bike around and power up things at will. I can only equate it to hitting a baseball square on with a bat. That "solid" feeling of all things connecting and in sync. It's rare, but when it happend it's ggggoooooood.

Since I was feeling so good, it was sort of hard to pull in the reins and say "you know 2:30 in the saddle will be enough". I want to save as much of that "magic" for next week's Big M-F L-Jack 100 as I can. So I did the course, had fun, and then rode the service roads back to Rt. 31 and my iPodless Xb.

I had my camera, but there was really nothing new to take pics of, so I felt no reason to take it out of my pocket.

Once home it was a quick spray off of the Dos Niner, a quick shower, some Wii Soccer (Real Madrid baby!), and a few Dogfish Head 60 Minutes. Annnnnnnd.... listeing to some tunes on my iPod... YES!!! IT LIVES!! Spin Cycle be damned!!

Finally a ton of congrats need spread out to some folks at Big Bear...

My good friends (Brad, Don, Aaron, and Rob) on Team Argyle finished 3rd, and on the box in the Male Expert category! Nice going guys!! You done me proud!! Teamates Suz Falvey and Chissy Buerkle finished 1/2 in the Female Solo category, Pro Bikes Fab Five finished 1st in the 5 Person Male cat, Pro Bikes/New River/Endura finished 1st in the Single/Rigid cat, my Pro Bikes teammate John McClurg finished 13th out of a strong 23 man field, and my friend and all 'round great guy Bob Anderson finished 2nd to Brandon Draugelis (congrats to you too dude). I might add that Bob is like TWICE as old as Brandon! My buddy Metro finished up in 21st, but I have NO DOUBT that a good time was had and the will have some stories to tell.

I was sort of obsessed with following the real time scoring for the race. So many friends and teamates raging down in WV. But it was alos sort of depressing. I wished I was there. I wished I had enough talent/race energy/cash to spread around and take part in it. It did SORT of make me want to go back to Seven Springs to race a Solo again, but I alternate with thanking God I might be done with Solos and willign to sacrafice a live pig to do another. Go figure.

Time to polish off a few more DFH 60 Minutes and get ready grill some meat.

Later.

Bug On The Road

Wifey and I had a great time last night. Chillin' out, eating some Mexican, drinking a few craft brewed beverages on the front porch, and celebrating her 38th birthday. I did manage to watch one full period of the Penguin game which broke my previous record of all most a whole period that I set two Saturdays ago. Nothing against it, it's just as I get older I have little interest in sports that I don't actually play or ever did play. Really I can't tell you the last FULL non cycling sporting event I watched. Anyway, I'm glad they one, it's good for the city. Now whether the city actually DOES anything with the revenue that the was/will be brought in is doubtful at best, but lets just try to be a little positive, eh.

With most everyone I know at Big Bear this weekend, and all my trails soaked by a weeks worth of heavy rains, I aborted any trip to the mountain and just headed out for a road ride, ON my road bike, which was the first time I was on it for almost a week. Felt good to be back on. That damn bike fits me so good, it's sick. Really, I'm nauseated just thinking about it.

It took me a while to get motivated this a.m.. I was up a 6:30 as usual, but just couldn't get motivated. I sat around starring blankly at my computer screen for a couple hours. Not sure what the hell I was waiting for, but finally I got the mojo to get kitted up and get my ride in.

Ride was the ride. 32 miles or so, a couple bits of fresh road, fresh legs, and home to chill and have a few beers before we head up to my father in-law's digz for Wifey Birthday Celebration Park II.

This pic was sort of funny, note the bug on my stem (may have to enlarge). That dude stayed on my stem and bars for a good 4 miles or more. Hope he enjoyed the ride.

That's about all I got goin' on. Nothing to much in the works this week as I focus on getting my ass to Michigan and ready for the Lumberjack 100 one week from today.

Later.

Enjoy

Enjoy the weekend. If you're racing, good luck, if you're chillin', chill with class. Just make sure you get on two wheels at some point. Today is my lady's 38th. So we're watching some Nick, enjoying a beer or 6, and eating some White Trash Mexicana. Not sure what's on top for me this weekend. Might go down to Big Bear to cheer on some folks, might go to the mountains to ride, or I might just become a sloth. Cheers!

Later.

Kinda Almost The Same

I needed more saddle time. OK, I WANTED more saddle time before the rain hit, so as soon as B-Man was to school, I was out the door with the Dos Niner. The plan was to do a similar ride to yesterday but add some more roads in and a couple more climbs.

I've been starting the rides this week with a 6+ mile spin on the rail trail. This has proved to be pretty cool, since that's about the extent of rail trail I can mentally stand, AND it provides a nice warm up for the legs. Of course there were 2 snake sightings on the trail, one of which was damn big and had markings that were just questionable enough to nearly leave me with a turtle head . Thank God for moving at 18.5 mph! (and for a tight sphincter muscles).

After 6ish miles on the rail trail it was on to the road, some climbs, another snake, some of yesterday's shit farm roads in reverse, and some new ones added in. On one narrow shit road climb a big ass dog comes running out after me. Barking, balls swinging, and frothing. GREAT! So I stop, let this big ass, shits like a horse dog sniff my f*cking crotch, and sweaty legs, whilst I try to not look at the BEWARE OF DOG sign in the yard and do my best to sweet talk the hairy fool back into the yard, and away from my chamoised up "ol chap".

This went on for two minutes or more. I kept hoping for the owner to come out. Nothing. FINALLY a car comes. I wasn't moving, I'll tell you that much! I believe the friendly hick in the car sort of knew the dog/owner so they stopped and distracted the dog so as for me to make my get away and retain all my appendages/organs. As I'm pedaling the owner FINALLY comes out, seemed nice enough and yelled out the old line "oh, he won't hurt you, he's just playful". Yeah, like I wanted to wait around to see him trot off with my lingam hanging out of his mouth like a freaking cigar. No thanks lady!

I passed this Organic Milk Jug Farm on the ride today. Who knew? The key to growing milk jugs in apparently top quality plastic spread out over your growing area. If you've never had milk from a homegrown, organic milk jug, you don't know what you're missing. I'm anxious for the day when I have enough land to grow my own. *sigh*

Soon the shit roads were done, and it was off to more of my regular road loop. You could tell you were moving out of the hard core sticks, because instead of big ass ball swinging dogs hungry for man crotch, and milk jug farms you had folks who were so over the top upper crust bourgeois that they laughingly throw out art that you and I would pay top dollar for (or at least steal from someone's garbage).

Lamp? Art? Both? Who knows? I'm going with "functional art". I think what the artist is trying to say is that you can reach out to people with ideas that can brighten their lives. Truly inspirational. I was moved. Sadly this piece will no long inspire. I wonder if it's biodegradable?

Soon was on my way back down to join up with the rail trail again. I hammered out the next few miles and ended with over 2.5 hours and over 40 miles of various road surfaces behind me. Felt good. I was also lucky because less than 45 minutes later we got a bust ass rain storm that soaked us for the next hour or so. More saddle time tomorrow? Maybe. MAYBE I'll actually use my road bike this week? Then again, I'm having a blast busting out miles on the Dos.

Good luck to all the folks racing Big Bear this weekend. Lots of friends and Pro Bikes teammates showing up for that one. I'm SORTA of weepy that I won't be there, but the physical, mental and financial cost of doing Big Bear this week and Lumberjack next week is just not worth it to me.

Extra special good luck to Team Argyle, I'll be watching the real time. Any bets on fastest lap between you guys? Hmmm, Don you're not gonna let Brad get the fastest lap are you?? And SURELY Rob won't! And there is NO way the 3 of you will let Aaron best you! HA! Have fun, be safe and kick ass.

Lastly, as of midnight tonight I will be married to a 38 year old. Yikes! An older woman! Happy B-Day Wifey.

Later.

Now That Was More Like It

I was anxious to get back on the bike today after yesterday's Semi Pro suck fest. While today had no promises of single track or endless low traffic roads, it did have a certain something, that made the ride fun, taxed the legs and made me work. I went out for my semi tri-weekly, borderline bi-monthly, almost tri-annual Rail Trail/Shit Road/Road ride on my mountain bike. In today's case it was my Dos Niner.

Just about everytime I do a ride like this, I wonder why I don't ride my 29er on the road more often. And today was one of those days. Yes, my 29er is slower and heavier than my road bike, but the way I look at it I NEVER race my road bike. EVER. Yet I often race my mountain bike on couses that often have road and forest road sections. So why not ride it MORE on the road?? I mean f*ck, half of Western PA's roads are so bad you're probably better off WITH a mountain bike, or a Cross bike anyway. I guess using the road bike does cut down on the wear and tear of the race bike.

Even though the Weather Channel was showing a bright sun icon, to describe the weather around Pittsburgh today, there was no sign of sun or blue in the sky ANYwhere. I guess the Weather Channel's "powers that be" have now just given up, and as long as it's not raining, it's "sunny" in Pittsburgh.

It was warm though, and nice and humid. One of my fave riding conditions (at least until my glasses fog up and I die of dehydration). In fact it was so humid someone found the need to ditch their thong at the entrace to the rail trail.

"She had dumps like a truck truck truck
Thighs like what what what
All night long
Let me see that thong"
-Sisqo

> RANT: Dear GOD those are real lyrics!!! JHC!! If I wouldn't have read it I would never have believed it. Yeah, and the music I listen to his lame. WTF?? We're all doomed. I mean I've TAKEN dumps like a "truck truck truck", but have NO idea what the "dumps" the much lauded poet Sisqo is referring to are. RANT OFF<

After about 5 miles on the trail trail I hopped off (thankfully), got on some of my normal road loop in and then hit some shock worthy back ghetto farm roads. I wish we had more of those around there. Most are steep, covered in loose rock, and riddled with pot holes. I actually think some of the forest roads on the mountain are smoother!

Rail Trail, sans thong.

A played shot, but there's something
to be said for slow shutter speeds.

Oh well, I could blather on more about my ride but I won't. It was fun, felt great and I got nearly 40 miles in. Not the most scenic, the most epic or the hardest of rides, but it was fun, and once again left me thinking that riding the mountain bike on the the roads, rail trails and pseudo paved services that I have at my disposal is a good idea. Hell I may even do it all over again tomorrow.

Time to go "make my booty go da na da na and take a dump like a truck truck truck"

Later.

Just Like Semi Pro

I had my choice of rides today- Road, ghetto farm road/rail trail, or single track. Because I have single track dependency issues, I of course went with single track at Boyce. Frig. It was the wrong choice. Seems that unbeknownst to me and keeping with my current luck, where ever I plan on riding is a magnet for storms. Not sure WHEN exactly the M'ville area got rain, but it looked to only have rained ON the park! HA! I like a good mud ride as much as the next guy, but I HATE Boyce in the mud. See pic for why-

Boyce mud is like sticky clay. It gets in your tires and reduces them to slicks. Some trails were darn good, but the shitty ones outweighed the good ones. I tooled around for a bit, got a sweat on, but wasn't having any fun. And that is the point for me. I figured my time would be better spent at home knocking out some XXC pages before Dad duties took over.

On the way home I kept thinking how this ride (or lack of) was just like my experience with the movie Semi Pro. I was all geeked up to see Semi Pro. I loved Anchor Man and Blades of Glory, and since as I "mature" my tastes in movies gets steadily more Immature I figured it would be great. Wrong. I remember putting on the DVD and in 10 minutes thinking "this is UNwatchable!!" Today's ride was just like that.

But I'm not gonna cry in a pint of something NOT beer about it. I'll make up for it tomorrow. Today I knocked out some good work, got more things planned out for XXC3 and did some bike work, which included, cutting down and installing my new Ergon grips on the Dos.

Of course I needed to geek out a bit...

Wow! That's a pretty big per grip weight difference. Sweet! There is a bit less rubber on new grips. I'll be anxious to see what my hands think after a few long rides and races.

Oh, yeah, the Lumberjack is hurling it's 100 miles of single track at me PDQ! YIKES! I have to say I'm worried about this one. A Long drive, that I have no idea where I'm going, followed by 4 25 mile laps of rolling on the gas single track. It's gonna be hard to pass though the pits and NOT want to just stop.

The point to point races are so different in that you don't have that pit area calling you name, telling you to stop. Have a beer. Chillllaxxx. In hindsight I should have schedule the Big Bear 12 hour and then the Wayne Ultra. Oh well, you live, you learn, you drive to Michigan to race 100 miles. Actually I'm looking forward to it. The rolling hills might play more to my gut of rolls. Jut hope the rain stays away

Later

Easy Does It

I know I need a rest when I don't ride and I don't get grumpy. It's almost like my body of slack says "thank you". I by no means put up killer states last week, but I know I rode and pushed more than I would have in the past, especially on the heels of Mohican. Not sure why. Fear? Boredom? Insatiable appetite for my bike that is only limited by the ability (and or lack there of) that I have. Whatever it is/was, it felt good just to chill today, work on the mag and get a ton of shit done around the house, including washing a couple of bikes.

I made some updates to the XXC site today. Added contributor links, some video links for GNAT's story, and updated the gallery. In the process I jacked something with the FTP and RSS feed crap, so if you have the XXC site linked and it's acting f*cked up, you may have to re link. Thanks. Not sure what the issue is. When I switched to using iWeb, something went amiss. Everything works 99.9% of the time, so I usually just roll with it. The site is just a host for the mag. One day I'll take the time to figure it out.

Hope to hit some dirt tomorrow if the storms hold off. If not, more pavement on the Campeon. OR maybe the Dos Niner and some ghetto farm roads. Hmmm, the life of a bike junky is pretty cool.

Later.

Smell That Fish Burp

Even though I was spent from the ride on Saturday, I was unable to not ride yesterday. The weather was too good and I just wanted to be outside on the bike. There was Sun, warm temps and the chance to ride some roads other than my normal weekday loops.

I'd like to think my legs felt great, but I think it was more the fact that I was riding skinny tires on pavement, and not fat knobbies in mountain mud that made my legs feel so good. I was able to get a 40 mile loop in, and it was nice to be out. The only "not nice" parts were climbing through a farm smelling cow shit and urine baking in the sun (see pic) and the long Black Snake on the road (no pic, too busy soiling myself). Actually even those "bad parts" were OK. Smelling cow shit reminds me that I'm in the sticks on my bike and if I have to road ride, that's were I want to be. And the snake, well, while I still hate snakes at least it was a Black Snake and not a Copper Head!

Heading in to this week with some clean living. Diet adjustments are being made and I'm hitting up a multi vitamin and Fish Oil to balance out body and brain. I've let myself get caught up in the "reward" eating/drinking. You know "I rode for 3.5 hours, I guess I can have 4 beers and 12 pieces of pizza". Yeah, it's not so much a reward if I do it 5 times a week! Next thing you know, I'm ordering some bibs "once size up" because the old ones "shrunk" and XXL jerseys because the one I have must be "Euro cut".


Gotta go work on my fish burps, start Issue #3 and think about updating the web site.

Later.

Crushed By The Mountain (and Don)

I'm crushed. Went to the mountain with Don P. today. Gotta say I'm spent. 3:25/33ish miles of mud, roots, mud, climbing, mud, roots, loose rock, climbing and mud. Not sure what the deal was. Forbes St. Forest must be a rain magnet or something. No rain here in the 412 for the last 48, yet there was ton of mud and standing water up there.

We both claimed tired legs from last weeks Mohican 100. Don was strong as per usual and I straddled the line between being a human ball of suck and feeling "not bad". (Ha, I said "straddled"). It was still a great ride even with some power sucking horse shit laced mud. To end it we both tapped into the power of the Argyle (08/09 versions respectively) to get up the final Camp Run Road climb.

As I told Don, thank goodness he was there or I would have totally pussed out on an epic once I saw the conditions on the mountain. Beautiful weather, with sun and sweet temps, but ddddamp earth. Felt good... once it was over!

Time to chillax with some friends, pizza, and beer tonight.

Later.

Kicking Around

Not much going down today. Hung out with Wifey who took a 1/2 day, took B-Man for a graduation hair cut and stopped at Pro Bikes to get the freshened up Dos Niner. New fork seals, wheels gussied up, etc., LBoH did a great job. Thanks man.

Other than that I spent the day kicking around some ideas for the mag and for some mag related items. Also cruising the net lusting some bike type things. Feeling the need to add something to the stable and been having fun lusting. The great thing about bike lust and bike related porn is that there is no real issue when your wife walks in on you looking at it. Now if you're looking at it and have no hands on the mouse or keyboard, you might have some issues to talk about with your therapist. That reminds me I have to cancel that 5 o'clock on Monday. Seriously bike porn is 100% safe and legal. Do it, take a look... I mean you're only looking, right?. Until the money comes out of the account, it's all good.

Gotta make some food. And get ready for graduation.

Later.

Now THIS one I felt.

Today I had that morning ride debate: Rest or ride, rest or ride? If a.m. conditions were prime, there would have been no doubt. Ride and ride dirt. But as it was, we got yet more rain last night and at least during my morning ride time, Boyce would have been slicker than the gutchies of a hobo hopped up on Milk of Magnesia and brown bagged wine.

So to cut to the chase (like any of this feecus is exciting) I DID ride, but sadly on pavement. The weather here continues to be chilly (for f*cking June!!!). Wet, muddy, gray and still reeking like that of the previously mentioned (see yesterday) Carp sack. But hey, it wasn't pouring when I rode, so that's all I can ask. Two or three miles in, I was pretty sure, OK, I was damn positive my legs had no spank. I figured, so what, I'll just futz along, and maybe explore a new rode option in my 30 mile loop.

So that's what I did, and I was rewarded with a nice gradual climb smooth road with plenty of shoulder and a nice down hill. Thank you Ride Gods. Thank you. I didn't exactly "futz along", but I wasn't going to set any PRs on my ride either. In fact I really think I literally heard my legs screaming as I did the last few climbs. They were yelling something in a Fred G. Sanford-esque voice- "What'cha you doin' fool?? 100 miles wasn't enough? You gotta make us do this road shit? WTF??" I just tuned out the voices (as usual) and focused on not getting off the bike to nap on the side of the road.

In the end I'm glad I went. Got some miles in the legs, found some new roads, and I gave myself a reason to enjoy a few Stoudts American Pale Ales tonight. Figure I'll rest tomorrow and hit up some dirt this weekend. Made up some Cheezy Broccoli Whole Wheat Pasta tonight, and had another BIG Salad. I've been ALL over the Big Salad lately. Dark greens, broccoli, tomatoes, mushrooms, olives, mmmmmm. I sure am making up for all that Vitamin K that I couldn't eat when I had to be on blood thinners. Not to mention I really stoke the fire for the Dutch Oven.

Tomorrow I can pick the Dos Niner up at Pro Bikes and then cap the night off with B-Man's Pre-School graduation. Hard to believe, but the time has come. Little dude will stark Kindergarten in the fall. Next up.. Prom.

Later.

Back At It

Well after 3 days off the bike, and in a post race Bell Jar, I was back at it today, and it felt so good to be back on the bike. Even though that bike was my road bike. In the end who cares what sort of bike it was or what kind of riding it was. I was riding my bike and my legs felt good.

The ride was nice even though fall seems to have returned to WPA. Temps in the low 60s/high 50s and rain. It was as damp and muddy as a Belgian cross race, but with a 0% cool factor. AND everything seemed to smell like dead fish. Why is that? I saw no fish, yet the air reeked of a Carp's nut sack (do they even have said items?). Really it wasn't so bad, warm enough that I didn't need a jacket and cold enough not to sweat like a fool. Again, the important part is that my legs felt good.

The Dos Niner is at Pro Bikes getting some man on bike wrench love. Fork getting lubed up, new seals, cables, and a few other items as needed. Hope to have it back soon and do some lovin' on it myself. Given all the rain, we've had, I'm probably forced to the road until the weekend anyway, so as long as the Campeon keeps going, it's all good.

Net Flicked an art nerd movie the other day- Helvetica. I really dug this documentary, but Wifey refused to watch it. I believe the phrase used was "I'm not watching a movie about a freaking font!" The part I enjoyed most was when all the love for Helvetica was over and designers like David Carson and his ilk started doing more the opposite of what Helvetica represents in design. Truth be told I'm a sucker for modermism (Swiss Style) and postmodernism. I guess that makes me some sort of design slut. OK, art nerd rant off.

Not sure what Thursday will offer bike wise. Time for more sleep (that which I seem to NOT be able to enough of) and what not.

Later.

Middle Aged Teen Angst & Dog Turds

The following sums up the way I've felt the past two days...

Last week my neighbor's dog shit in my yard. So before I mowed the grass I shoveled it up, bagged it in plastic grocery bag and put in the garbage can in the alley. Last night when I took more garbage out, I noticed that the can was filled with rain water, so I dumped it out. There was some random bit of garbage that fell out; A Coke can, a random candy bar rapper, and a small plastic grocery bag. I started to pick the items up and throw them back in the can. I picked up the grocery bag (haven forgot what it was recently used for) and liquefied dog turd spilled onto my hand. Smelly, tan, warmed by warm summer rain, not MY dog, dog turd. On my hand. Oh life. How I love thee.

I won't go into the mental lull or the extent of my teen angst or how I've been taking ennui to new levels. What I will say is that I did find time in between Morrissey songs and being a dick to all who I come in contact with to look up some of my Mohican 100 history. It tells a few stories, lets take a look...

2006: Time: 11:23, 19th out of 56 starters
2007: Time 10:27, 39th (right behind Mr. Hilimire) out of 71 starters.
2009: Time 9:46, 62nd out of 123 starters.

Seeing this made me feel good for a few reasons. One of course is that my times HAVE gotten better over the years. I mean really, look at 2006... Over 11 HOURS?? WTF? Granted courses change, conditions change, etc., but it's still nice to see some progress even though my placings don't show it. It's also cool knowing how I felt after the race. No, I wasn't ready to go another 50 miles and I was hurting, but I wasn't destroyed either. Not sure the reason, but I have felt good at the end of every race so far this year. Not giddy like a school girl, tingly in the nut region, song and dance show tune singing, type good, just not destroyed. That is a big to me.

What also is super cool is taking a look at the start numbers. In 2006 there were 56 Open Male racers. In 2009 there were 123. That's more than double. And that rocks. I think these endurance races just my catch on! ;)

I also wanted to jot down things that worked nutritionally for me.

1. CytoCarb II (4 scoops) mixed with powdered Gatorade (1 scoop). 3 bottles used in race.
2. Each bottle also contained several drops of Elete. (not one cramp in 100 miles)
3. Vanilla PowerGel: I think I ate 6 to 8.
4. 3 Musketeers and Snickers. 4 to 6 "fun sized" bars. Better and cheaper than 99% of all sports bars.
5. Cold Pepsi got me through the last 8 miles or so of the race. Bbbbburp!!!
6. I was also forced to use some Heed and regular bottled Gatorade. I used to be a HUGE Heed fan. Now, not so much. And bottled Gatorade taste like straight sugar.

So that is my post race week in a nut shell. Dog shit, angst, race nostalgia, and junk food nutrition.

Time for bed.

Later.