Stung Stingers and Deletions

I am consumed with the all things XXC right now. I love it, got a lot done, but the fact I was outside the house for the total of about 10 minutes is turning my mind to mush. Tomorrow I will throw myself full on in the the gray fall of WPA (not to be confused with the gray spring, summer and winter) of WPA and NOT to be confused with the 6 to 8 days of sun we had about a week or two ago.

These stingers got stung by the gutter dude/bug guy/contractor dude/dude that does all the man type stuff I don't know how to do today. INCLUDING killing giant swarms of stinging insects living in siding of my house!

XXC is close to ready (did you see the cover?), some cleaning up to do, some links to ad, a story to squeeze in and it will be done for Monday I hope. The mag is gonna be huge this go around, and I am left with some decisions on how to publish it. The DL will be HUGE and if I lower the output I fear it will loose some crispness and quality. Do I JUST put it up on Issuu? Folks can still DL if they want to. The thing is that Issuu doesn't let me track my downloads, just views. I could put the four mags on a disc for people, but then I'd have to charge folks for the disc/postage/time, and I'm not sure folks would dig that. UG! And to top it all, during some file testing and debating I accidental deleted #3 from Issuu tonight. So if you were on the site and saw it gone, that was why. It's back now though.

The Dos is set and ready, all I need is my mushy ass cheeks lubed and in the saddle and a plan for some miles in the a.m. As long as I get some needed sleep tonight (hopefully without the aid of sleeping pills again).

Later.

An All Nighter

Pulled an all nighter last night. And NOT because I wanted to or needed to. I could NOT FREAKING SLEEP! Finally at 1 a.m. I took a sleeping pill, but it didn't kick in until about 2:30 or 3 a.m. Holy macaroni! So if you combine about 3.5 hours of sleep and waking up to more heavy rain, any plan of ride was forgotten. Quickly.

Stopped over the shop for some NoTube love and to pick up a couple Co2 cartridges. Then it was just more emailing and work on the mag. I have one more big article to finish up this week, then #4 should be good to come come Monday. I can't wait!

Fall temps and leaves are falling fast.
Might have to order up some wool!

Time to go take some sleeping pills and climb into bed. MUST. HAVE. SLEEP!

Later.

That's Enough

Fall kicked me right in the man junk this weekend. First with that shitty mountain weather yesterday and then it picked right up where it left off today with down pours and chilly temps. I was sweating my ballz off earlier in the week and now I'm chilled to the bone. Frig!

I gave riding the big middle finger salute today and opted to chill, clean up the Dos Niner (which as been encrusted in a mud for a week now) and get the Mamasita's rubber readied to get re-NoTubed. I also spent the day completely whoring the mag to any MFG with an e mail addy. I feel so dirty, but I gotz to try to make some scratch in the near future or I'll be turning tricks in the park.


Wifey and I had a great time last night a my buddy Y-Nizzle's digs. Ate some SERIOUS chicken tacos, drank some Storm Kings and just had a great time. I also got to see the dude's new Niner M.C.R. that he got from the Goat. Damn is it nice. LOVE the look of the steel pipes. They just ooze class.

Y. got me so geeked on the chicken taco last night I have some meat marinating right now, so I guess I better go check my meat and get ready to throw down some Mexicana and fire up my bung for a 2nd morning in a row. (You're HAVE to be seriously questioning why you EVER read this blog! Hell, I'm questioning it so you HAVE to be!!)

Later.

Soggy Bottom On Top The Mountain

Was going to NOT ride today given the misty rain and forecast for heavier rain, but my mood was turning shittier than a wet dog turd, so I grabbed the rain jacket, the Mamasita, the camera (and a nice strong ZipLoc for it) and headed to the mountain. I was going to EMBRACE the wet and mud.

Well I embraced it alright, Ma Nature gave me a bitch slap and an UN golden shower by turning that mist into a steady drizzle and then a steady downpour. Why does she have to be such a bitch?? Still had some fun. Did a new trail or two, and did some others in reverse.

Towards the end I got a slow leak in my rear tire. I'm happy to say that this was the closest I've come to a flat tire this season! GOD BLESS YOU STAN!! I think the only reason it wouldn't seal up was that I really can not remember the last time I had Stan-goo put in. But now that I have FINALLY sort of had a flat I can talk about it and not jinx myself. I can't enough about how freaking BOSS going tubeless and Stan's is! 7 months of riding and racing and NO flats until today. Stan = TITZ!!

Got some OK pics and got out of the house. Other than the slow leak and some pain in the ass chain suck in all the mud and grime, it was nice to get out and embrace the wet and mud. It was also nice to know that I was NOT racing at the Rattlesnake today. That one had to be freaking EPIC!! YIKES!!!

So while the trip was not the best of the year, it was a ride and even a so/so ride is better than no ride at all.

Later.

That was nice

Non stop go-go from the alarm today. In between all my XXC/Dad/Husband duties I did manage to squeeze in a ride that came in just a dog's nuggets hair under 40 miles today. And yet once again it was on my Mamasita. I can NOT get the mojo to get on the road bike anymore... EVEN when I'm riding on the road. WTF?? Issues.

Because it's pissing down rain this a.m.. and I'm bored...

The day was full of sending off some shirts, putting in some miles and putting up some blog posts on the site that sort of pays the bills, at least if those bills were non existent... :)

The rest of the day went quick and it was over before I knew it. I would bitch but much of it was getting XXC #4 in line, and I have to say #4 is gonna by our/MY best yet. Folks really stepped up with this one and #4 is gonna have some killer words and photos. I'm so geeked!! I can't say thank you enough to the writers and photographers. I have one more article to lay out and we are good to go. Look for #4 the first week of October! JOY!!!

Time to finish a Torpedo and fight some crime....

Later.

Photo Madness II (Taking it back)

After 3 days I FINALLY got out on the bike today. Felt damn good to get out for a couple hours for the Rural Ghetto Loop and blow the stank out of my legs and mind. I continue to ride my mountain bikes for about everything. I can't even remember the last time I was on my road bike. I think it was early August, but I'm not sure.

The ride was uneventful other than forgetting my freaking socks and having to drive home to get them, and almost getting taken out by a roadside chicken at 31 MPH downhill. Scared the shit out of me! Who the hell expect there to be a chicken on the side of the road. I mean I've seen them pecking around in the guys yard before, but never along the road. Yikes!

To follow up on yesterday's Photo Madness post by saying I'm taking it back. Not the camera, but my words. The camera actually preformed really well today. Good enough to let me do my thang with Photo Shop to easily get them where I wanted. I still might look for a quicker camera to use on rides where I just want to keep moving, snap some pics and see what I can. Here's a little slide show from today.

Later.

Photo Madness

This post has little if anything to do with bike, racing, or cycling. Which is most likely why I'll get more readers than ever today.

Took Sunday off the bike, and took Monday off the bike to get a bunch of sh*t done. Figured I'd put in a few hours today. Well it pissed down rain most of the a.m.. So I putzed around the house muttering obscenities aloud like an insane old hobo. AND I delved further into my pursuit of a new point and shoot digital camera.

I have the WORST luck with digital cameras! I currently own one ancient Cannon Digital Elph that has no button so can't be used, and even though it took great pics they only get about 500 pixels wide. Then I have/had a Kodak EasyShare that had 10+ MP, but must have a truly suck sensor, because the images sucked. And on top of that it had an ON/OFF button that was so small that I could barely turn it on with my bare fingers let alone riding with gloves on. On top of all that the LCD screen imploded last week. Leaving me with JUST a Kodak EasyShare CX7430 that I got on eBay for $50 a year or so ago. And truth be told, it's the best camera I've owned! More on that later.

I like snapping pics on and off the bike, nothing PRO, just something to get me where I want to be in PhotoShop. So I started looking for a point and shoot that would fit my needs. Cheapish, decent pics and an easy ON/OFF button where my main requirements. Based on reviews I narrowed it down to the Panasonic Lumix DMC-FS25. and the Cannon PowerShot A1100. The Cannon won out because no one had the FS25 in stock local, and I liked that the Cannon uses AA batteries (since I have rechargeable ones) and the same sort of memory cards that I already have. So today I went to BestBuy to get it.

Made sure I read the return policy, got a replacement program (since I brake a lot of shit), and came home to test it on out. The test shots I took were damn nice. And the macro was ssooo much better than my Kodak. BUT the freaking shutter lag is UNexcetable! Dear God! Press the button and then 5 days later the camera fires. Since I'm generally moving while I'm taking photos this just won't do. I putzed and futzed with differing settings, etc., but what it comes down to is that I want a camera that can be used while I'm moving. If I was just using the camera to take snap shots of people, it would be fine, but all this auto focus crap is killing my mojo for the photos.

OMG! I'm moving while taking a photo!

So I will just suck up the 15% restocking fee and take this camera back. The Panasonic was about $100 more, and I had buyers remorse for not getting it, but then I re-read the review and it has some serious shutter lag due to auto focus crapola. For now I guess I'll just stick with my $50 Kodak. In fact I may buy up another one on FleaBay before they're all gone. The images are pretty good, I like to monkey with my shots in PhotoShop anyway, it just that this one already has a couple cracks and dings, and since I spilled water on it a month ago doesn't seem to want to come on ALL the time. But I can make due.

If you have any recommendations for a digital camera that takes good shots, with little or now shutter lag in the $0 to $275 range, but all means give me a shout.

EDIT: Took the camera on my ride today and it preformed MUCH better than expected. For what I do, I think I will keep it. I still might look into for cheap-o P&S for MTB rides.

Oh Yeah...

4.5 hours in the saddle
40 miles
3 bottles
1 flask of homemade gel (which rocked!)
A LOT of climbing.
A LOT of descending.
And one of the best ride days of the year on the mountain/ever.
This was one to stick in the ride spank bank for around January. Good stuff.

AM EDIT: Now that I have some more time, I will blather more about my ride. With the legs pretty rested from the SM100 melt down, and WPA having the best weather of the year I knew in my mind that I wanted to get some quality knobbies on mountain dirt love this weekend.

I recently explored a nice little 5 mile addition of forest roads and rocky double track that adds 5 miles on to my standard loop. This puts The Standard at a sweet 40 miles. During some of my exploring I was doing Beltz Road (wide rocky grassy double track) down to Buck Run Road (forest road) and then looping back up to Martz. But for the sake of a more natural "loop" I came UP Beltz. It's not a fast climb, due to some rocky parts, grass, and roots, but all middle ringable. It was interesting to climb and constantly get hit with falling acorns from the trees that towered along side of me. Another sign that fall is in the air to go along with the leaves that are starting to litter the trail and the once bright green mountain ferns now starting to turn a bit yellow.

One back up top it was Red Oak Trail back down a bit to hit some single track on the Lookout Loop. All said and done the East side loop was a hair under 20 miles when I started the road climb up to North Woods. The rest of the ride was my normal loop which sort of weaves through a selection forest roads, snow mobile trails and single track and pretty much down/up/down/up/down/up for another 20 miles.

As I was finishing up Mountain Streams Trail I was starting to run out of water, and I just sucked down the last of my JasonGel® (nice name, eh?). I had one mini 3 Musketeers left and I was saving that for the base of the Camp Run climb. Mountain Streams is finally about 95% dry! It only too ALL summer. When it's dry the is a fun section of trail, when it's wet it sort of sucks. Literally, the mud will suck a shoe right off a foot.

I hammered the last super flat section to the base of the climb and got ready to start climbing. I ate my last bar, and started up CRR. As the climb got steeper I switched into my granny. And immediatle heard a rubbing noise. WTF?? NOT AGAIN!! Yep, I apparently broke ANOTHER spoke (I had just broke one 3 weeks ago) and now my tire was rubbing my chain stays when I would switch into granny, but not if I left it in my middle ring. Frig. I knew I COULD climb CRR in my middle ring, but with about 35 miles in my legs and back, I was planning on nice spin to the top. Oh well, into the middle I went and stayed there to the top, only stopping to let a 4x4 pass me with a friendly old man who stopped along side me to say "don't see many bikers riding up this road, nice to see you out here, have fun". Nice and all, but not sure why it would be nice to see me out there? Oh well, it's a welcome change from the normal shit that gets yelled at me by people in cars.

A few miles later I was at the top, pass the cemetery, pass the snowmobile club, pass the private "don't even look at me" homes, and back to the xB. When I had passed the snowmobile club, I noticed they were laying out some sort of race course. In my warped mind I thought "maybe there's some sort of CX race there?" HA! But of course it wasn't, it was a snowmobile grass drag race (WTF?), I found that out when I saw the sign further down the road at the entry to my parking lot. Reading the sign was not without incident- I saw the sign out of the corner of my eye, and wanted to go back to see what it said. I started to turn, my wheel dug in the gravel, and I was slammed down to the gravel at 1 MPH and 10 yards from my car. Yep, 40 miles of riding in the mountains and I crash 10 yards from my car going 1 MPH. I'm such an idiot. But I DID have fun.

Feel Good Moments

Feel Good Moments. I'll take 'em where I can get 'em 'cause often times life is jank.

#1 Waking up is always nice. Dieing in my sleep seems like a nice option for when I'm 90, but at 38 waking up is expected and welcomed.

#2 Waking up B-Man. Dude never wants to get up, and I can't blame him. BUT that minute that I just sit beside him watching him sleep before I start the "good time daddy" wake up crap is priceless. I'll miss that when he's older.

#3 Seeing B-Man get embarrassed when girls in his class say hi to him when I drop him off. Priceless and funny as hell. Even better is when the teachers assistant says hi to him. He admitted to me a couple weeks ago when he looked at her one day he thought of the "b word" (that would be boobs). Too funny.

#4 Taking a bunch of envelopes stuffed with black and white T-shirted goodness to the post office. While I have to sell a BUNCH more before I break even, seeing ANY positive number in the XXC ledger is nice. Even better is that some folks dig the design, message, etc., FYI, if you're at Interbike next week, keep an eye out. There will be 1 to 3 folks sporting the shirts from time to time.

#5 I did a layout yesterday for a kick ass story a dude submitted to the mag. He had a great story and great pics from a pro photog who was down with the XXC vibe. BUT I f*cked up. I took some easy ways out and turned out an acceptable but boring 5 page layout. Today I said "f*ck that" and redid the whole thing, and NOW I feel GOOD about what I did.

#6 Planning a nice rice for Saturday. So I took the day off the bike today, got work done, relaxed and planned out my Saturday. Tomorrow will be an hour or so on the Rail Trail just spinning out the legs and listening to some muzak.

#7 Speaking of Muzak... "Lemmy The Movie"!! That's all you had to say caucasian!!

Later.

Getting Sorted

Had a busy ass day, with mucho running around, plus a 30 minute stop in traffic to wait for an accident to clear. Then it was on to a painfully too short hour ride that was supah-fast on mucho buff like cement single track. The ride was not SUPPOSED to be an hour, but the sit in traffic put me all behind schedule. Curse you two goofballs! CURSE YOU!!

After the ride it was home for some shirt sorting...

Finally got my shirts for the mag in. Sweet! Pretty happy with them. Hope to have one or two other ones available after I get issue #4 put to bed in the coming weeks.

Gotta split. Much to do.

Later.

One Good and One Better

Monday was a non stop go-go day in a good way. B-Man to school home to work on the website, and the mag, do some e mailing, house stuff, and then out for short ride to blow the responsibility off me. Did a short 1:30 at Boyce on some of the driest trails my knobs have touched this year! Great googly-moogly! It was like riding on pavement! Then it was home for more shower, more mag stuff, and B-Man pick up, etc., Hell I even found myself still working on some stuff last night. Not because I had to, just 'cause I wanted. I like that feeling. Haven't had that feeling since back when I used to draw. I never EVER, EVER had that from my job, but the creative outlet that the mag and this blog gives me really helps. I might not be thinking that when I living in a box under the bridge, but for now I'll just enjoy it.

Since I did mad amounts of work (for me, I mean I'm no workaholic, believe me) I freed up some time to get myself on some more mountain dirt, do a new trail and explore some others. The ones I explored were sort of just quad paths that sadly just petered out after a bit.

One ended up in what looked to be someones yard or hunting camp. Anytime I end up someplace where there is a permanent camo tree house, I start to feel uncomfortable and just get my ass out of there before I get capped with titanium tipped arrow or can of Keystone Light.

Found myself going up Auckerman Road today. It is SO much steeper in person, but I will say I like it better than the Camp Run Road climb. It's about 3 miles to the top, but after a couple miles of granny gear 3.5 mph riding, you can middle ring much of the rest and that's cool. Today was great. Not long, only about 20 miles but with the climbing and exploring I got in a fun 2.5 hours of riding. Not gonna bitch about that.

I pretty much stuck to the Mt. Stream Trails today. Jeff Barr Trail (Dead Guy), Mountain Streams, Auckerman, Noth Woods, the Mountains Streams decent, some trail investigating, and then back to Dead Guy and the xB. As a bonus I got to do a couple small stream crossings. Nothing says "you need new XTR external bottom bracket cups" like a couple stream crossings!

As I typed this I realized how my friend Brad is not gonna like this post. He recently told me that since I quit my job and got happier, my posts have gotten lame and predictable. I guess my misery and bitching may have been a bit more entertaining to some. Maybe the blog "jumped the shark" when I quit my job? Oh, it's not even fall yet, I have a whole winter and holiday season of misery just waiting to be written about! LOL!

Time to got make some chow. Later.

Misty Mountain Riding

I was anxious to get some nice saddle time in Saturday, but I had enough "epic" riding last weekend, and just wanted to take it easy and have some fun Saturday. I also knew that I did not want to ride the road and Boyce while in fine shape, is more suited for my weekday rides. So I did what any knobbie tired dirt loving person would do. Head to the mountain to get my ride on for a couple hours.

The ride was nothing to special. I wanted to check out a trail, and a road to add to my BIG loop and not spend too much time doing the big forest road climbs, like I said I think I did enough of those LAST week. The cool temps and some early morning drizzle brought the mist and fog out in force in the mountains. It made for cool riding and some nice pics. So rather than blather on about a short (but damn fun) two hour ride, I'll just post the pics...




Right after this shot William Wallace came charging at me wielding a sword and attempted to lop my head off. I was too fast for him though!

Later.

I'm not THAT shocked...

I'm not THAT shocked that I saw a grown man cry on the Food Network last night as he competed to win a $10,000 prize in a food stylist competition. Yep, $10K!!!!! Don't get me wrong, I gotz nothing against food stylists. I KNOW how hard it is to make cooked food look appetizing on film, but $10,000?? TV coverage?? Crying???

Jeremiah Bishop won MAYBE $400 for his win at the Shenandoah 100 last weekend, and some douche cries about how his shrimp looked on film?? Not to be a dick, but that dude can go have large amounts of sex with himself. I know chick racers with WAY more ballz than some dude CRYING about the way his food looked. J.B. and other pros train their asses off and get paid shit, so this dude can shove his unappetizing on film pie up his (A.M. EDIT! WHOOO MAMA I GOT CARRIED AWAY!)

Sorry to rant so much, but I know what it takes just to do these races and totally SUCK at them, so whatever the Pros are doing is just off the f*cking charts hard and they get SH*T in return! While people playing poker, food styling, and baking cakes are taking home over 10 large ones. WTF?? To each their own, we all choose what we do, but sometimes I just can't believe that USA Cycling can't pay the way for athletes to compete overseas, and that the National XC series has shit prize money. WHAT is the incentive for our Pros and soon to be Pros to win?? UGGGG!!

Sorry, I just needed to vent a bit.

Later.

12 Steps To Post (Suck) Race Happiness

With the help of too much first hand knowledge on recovering from a suck race effort, I now share my 12 step program to get back to cycling happiness. Please note that this program is not endorsed by any coach, doctor or high level athlete. It is however twelve easy steps to help you KEEP racing and firmly in the mid pack or whatever non podium pack you reside.

12 Steps To Post Suck Race Happiness

1. Drink beer. This is sort of a must. If you don't drink. Do what ever sort of mind numbing liquid, chemical, herb or activity you want. I prefer to forget the race for a bit with some quality craft beer.

2. Eat. Eat comfort food. Food that makes you feel good and food that helps replace all the calories, protein, etc., that you lost during the event. Mexican food works for me. Plus all the gas it gives me makes me laugh, forget the race AND it play a part of #7.

3. Hydrate. After #1, you MIGHT want to finally start to hydrate a bit.

4. Accept A Higher Power. In this case the "higher powers" are the gods of cycling. Accept that sometimes they just have other plans for you during a race. Someday their plan might work in your favor, so keep 'em happy! I find finally cleaning the puke, sports drink, sweat and mud off your bike is good penance and the gods seem to dig it.

5. Think. Now you can start thinking about the race. Not about the bad things, those are too obvious right now. Think about the good things. (Finished, had fun for 75% of the race, didn't die, no snakes, hung with some great people, rode (and sadly walked with) my bike all day.

6. Go for a ride. It's been a couple days now. You don't want to turn into a fat bloated, drunk. Go for a nice recovery spin, put some music in you ears and just enjoy your bike again. Spin along knowing that even though you suffered, you surely gained SOME sort of fitness.

7. Get Re-Stoked. That didn't take long... just about 3 days. Sounds about right. Way to grow a set. Think about the next race or epic ride and congratulate yourself by doing something manly like scratching your nuggets, farting, looking at porn, or something like that. Note: If you're a woman this one may change just a tad. But then again, what do I know, there are some tough free thinking, free spirited chickies out there racing.

8. Think. (again!). You've accepted that shit can go wrong, you've thought about the great parts of your last race, and you've developed a plan to do another race. NOWWWWW is the time to think of the things that you f*cked up during the race that WERE in your control. Nutrition? Hydration? Rest? Now develop a plan to TRY to rectify for the issues for the next race. It might not work, but it will at least help you to try to gain control.

9. Ride (again). Now it's time to ride again. But ride with oompf. Ride with the desire to start building again. Not TOO much!!! Not yet! But ride with the thoughts of your next race in your mind.

10. Enjoy. This one takes on even more meaning late in the season. Ride because you love it. Ride to earn yourself some beers. Ride because it's so f*cking sweet! Bask in the dirt, in the mud, in the knowledge that you are out on two wheels in the woods and snow might be on the ground in a couple months.

11. Race again. Race ONE more enduro, one more XC or get super silly and race some cross.

12. Drink a beer. I like the whole "full circle" thing. Plus I stole this whole 12 Steps thing from SOMEONE, and I feel I owe them some business. That, and I ran out of steps.

Use this wisely. If you had a great race, good for you. You can just do steps One and Twelve. But I doubt that the sorts of people that have great races read this blog. But I could be wrong.

Later.

Mid Pack King!

Who's your Mid Pack King bitches?? Yeah that would be ME! CyclingNews.com reports that at the SM100 there were 315 men in the Men's Open Class, I finished 158th! That is STRADDLING my sagging hairy nuggets right over the mid pack and giving me a big old NUE mid pack nut splitter! The mid pack is MY hood!!!! So STEP, THE F*CK, OFF or I'll pop a cap in your ass!!!!! (That is of course if a "cap" is a some lame ass blog post).

Sure I thought I was gonna die with less than 12 miles to go, and SURE it took me like 2 hours to do 12 miles, but THAT is what makes a Mid Pack Whore a Mid Pack Whore. So all the haters can suck it!

BTW, check the new banner. What is different? Plus, did you know you can spell "worshipper" two ways? Hmmm.

Later.

6:45 AM EDIT: Wow I was pretty fired about about my mid packness last night. Not sure there are "haters", but it did sound good. Sorry I mentioned "nuggets" too. That was a bit strong. ;)

The Four Hundred And First Mile

I left the north. I traveled south.

Split the W-OH mid morning on Saturday for Stokesville, Vadge. The trip was the trip. Just me the xB and an iPod full of muzak from my faves. The holiday traffic slowed things down a bit, but not too bad. The thing that DID slow me down was getting lost about 3 miles away from the Stokesville Campground. But as I drove along the back, back, back roads I saw a hairy, pot bellied shirtless, tobacco chewing Virginian getting his mail and asked him directions. He was super nice and it turns out, the campground was right down the road. BTW That description of the man, was not an unfunny attempt at some sort of a southern stereotype. He was indeed shirtless, pot bellied and spit a gob of tobacco juice out just before he answered my question. Super nice though.

Once in the campground I stalked Bradley via cell phone to find out where we were camping. Finally the tin can/string that he calls a cell phone worked and he met me to direct me down to the sweet camp spot Ruthie C . and J.P. nailed down for us. The spot was sweet! Back in the shade of the woods, away from the keg stands and late night shenanigans.

Soon our friends Rob and Chrissy joined us and we got all settled in. Rob and Brad went out for a spin while I got registered and stood about talking to Plum Grove Pete. Later we all went up to the pasta buffet that the SM100 folks were putting on. We enjoyed a foamy cup of Dogfish goodness and then retired to our campsite to ready our drop bags and bottles for the race.

Soon I was in the back of the xB pretending to sleep for the next 7 hours. Before your knew it the gong was going off and I was scurrying off with my cheeks clenched tight to the porta john for a pre breakfast nerve induced blow out.

Two PB&J bagels, one iced coffee, one lubed chamois, and one sunrise later I found myself about the 490th rider back in a group of 500+ riders on the start line. Poor planning on my part. But it will thin out. Right? At least after 30 miles or so!

Out of the campground and up the first climb. I was feeling good spinning in my middle ring, passing folks and getting ready to hit the first single track. As expected a line of riders formed in the single track like scared cattle off to the slaughter house. Inching along the dirt and rock. Really no fault of the riders. I'm sure most everyone was accomplished enough, but when you get hundreds of folks going 4 mph through rocks and roots, shit happens and shit slows. Or maybe I should say "constipates"?

Slack jawed and over saturated.

Soon enough things opened up and I was feeling great. Then we hit a steep single track section that turned into hundreds of riders hike-a-biking (Ruthie plowed through this!). A few folks made it up in spots, but it was hard with so many riders. Once to the top though, it was a rippppppppppppppping fast single track descent to the bottom. I was grinning from ear to ear and I blew through rocks, and one of the best downhills in a long time. Even better, there would be a few more this day!

The thing about a long race like the Shenandoah 100 is that things sort of blur and there is no use trying to remember too much. All I know is that things were going great. My legs felt great and every time I felt like pushing harder, I just backed off a bit. The goal for this race was to NOT blow up like I did at the 101. Just keep it steady, and have fun. And that's what I did. At least for the time being.

The race was moving along quickly and soon I found myself at the base of the "Soul Crusher" climb. 15+ miles of steady climbing to Aid Station #5 with maybe six MORE miles of up after that (unbeknownst to me). As I made my way up I was still feeling good. I ate a Snickers, kept taking in water, and CytoCarb/Gatorade and a shot of gel here and there. At about mile 10 or so of the climb things started getting a little harder for me. I was using the granny and just trying to recover and get ready for the 25+ miles to come.

At Aid 5 there was a ton of food, pizza and an old racing friend Paul (one time called Spot Paul. But I'm not sure he rides a Spot anymore, so he's just Paul). I thought I saw Paul at Aid Station 2, but wasn't 100%. But indeed it was. As much food as there was to pick from, I had NO appetite for ANYTHING. Just got my bottles filled, quickly said hi to Paul, took an Elete capsule and took off.

You can kick me, and you can punch me,
and you can break my face.

"OK, lets do this" I thought to myself as I pedaled out of #5. Should be downhill now? WRONG!! MORE CLIMBING!! (I guess THAT is why they call it the Soul Crusher). After just a mile or so I needed to stop and gather myself. Something was going south FAST in my belly and with me. I was freezing one minute (it was a little chilly on top the mountain) but then I would feel my face flushing and I was get freaking hot as balls. So I would dump some water on myself and keep on.

Soon it was happening, I could feel it. Shit was gonna go bad. I need to just keep it moving! "What the f*ck?" I thought to myself. I was eating, drinking, going steady, but now the thought of drinking one drop of anything made me want to puke and I was losing power FAST. Soon enough I would dry heave a few times. Great.

SOMEHOW I got myself to Aid Station 6. I sat down for a minute and a dude filled my bottles with fresh water (thanks!). I asked him how much more to go and he said it was about 12 miles with one more climb. "I will NOT STOP with 12 miles to go!" I told myself, but I ssssooooo wanted to just lay in the grass and go to sleep.

Not more than a mile out of Aid 6 I thought I made a mistake. I wanted to say "f*ck it" and turn around. I was frustrated at the fact that for the 3rd race in a row I would rip off 70 to 80 miles without a problem and then just shut down and have to claw my way to the finish. I pedaled a bit, started to come alive, passed a few folks and then shut down again. Walked a bit. Rode a bit. Then I started hitting more of the final climb and my stomach was in full on revolt. Pedal 100 yards. Stop, dry heave up some CytoFlem™ and then walk a bit. This went on for a couple miles and culminated with me being passed by not only my friend Plum Grove Pete who I passed and left behind several miles ago, but a slew others as well.

The trail started going down hill for a bit. Oh wait, now it's going up. Stop, walk, vomit, repeat. I was a mess. I hadn't taken any food or drink since right after Aid 5. Well at least any that STAYED where it was supposed to be.

Why is the last mile the hardest mile?

Finally some double track started dropping down hill fast, I rode it as fast as I could, saw a sign turning me right and hit some fun single track that thank God kept going down. OMG! The campground! I think I'm gonna make it! All I wanted to do was finish, lay down and not puke in front of 500 people. And that's what I did. Crossed the line, got my finishers pint glass, laid down and asked myself if a summer spent pursuing 401 miles of NUE racing was worth it for a bunch of pint glasses and t shirts.

I saw Rob snap my pic, and I talked a bit more to Paul who was now several beers in. Then made my way down to the camp. Brad wa sleeping off his own bonk and woke up when I got there. I laid the Dos down, and sat my ass down. I was not happy about the day. How can I be so "on" for 80 miles, but fall apart in almost every race? Why is it always my stomach? Who knows? What I do know is that this was one of the best courses I ever raced. Big climbs, big views, and fast, fun single track. I also know that even with the many miles of pain that I encountered (due to my lack of fitness, balls, stomach, etc,) over the 401 miles of NUE racing that I did this year, it was worth it. I saw new places, hung out with some good friends and met some new ones. Will I attempt to race at least 4 again? Probably not. There is much to do in the way of figuring out the bonk issues that have plagued my racing career and I want to figure out how to get my racing to a place where the pain comes from the race and pushing myself. NOT the inability to keep food down during a race.

My racing will continue to be scaled back as I read the awful truth that is the the writing on my physiological walls, but I'm pretty certain that the Shenandoah 100 will be on the list of "must dos". Folks that live in that area and can ride there are damn lucky. Endless forest roads, and trails. Just amazing.

After a phone call to Wifey, a Polish Bath, and getting some water to stay down, we headed up for some food and some 60 Minute. Then back to the camp to hang out with my friends and racing buddies. It was damn fun, and I soon forgot about the bad parts of the day and just enjoyed being amongst some bike loving endurance freaks, even if it took me 11 hours to do that.

Racing for '09 might be over or I might squeeze one more in October. That does NOT mean that epic days in the saddle are over though. I mean hey, I CAN make to 80 miles without vomit! ;)

You can butt me, and you can break my spine,
but you won't change the way I feel, 'Cause I love you

Later.

Keeping It Realistic

Got a nice and easy 35 mile ride in today. Now nuttin' left but Sunday's Fiery Fist O'Pain called the SM100. JOY!

Started today's ride from the rail trail before hitting the surrounding farm roads after about 6 or 7 miles. On the way there I see a car in front of me with a vanity plate that I THOUGHT said "4 LESBOS" (as in isle of...). So of course my reaction (being of small mind and sophomoric nature) was "Hell yeah, sister! I'm with ya!" Then I looked once more... SHIT! Not only does it say "4 LEBOS" (a last name?) it was some old so not a lesbian man driving. Just another stupid feather in my cap of stupidity.

Legs felt good on the ride, maybe too good 'cause I ended up going for a bit futher than I wanted. Oh well, I won't be riding tomorrow. Just sitting my ass in the xB and then a camp chair for the evening. I'm not much for the night before ride. I need every calorie and ounce of energy my aging and growing ever flabby non ass can get.

So with that I leave you. Off to do one of my final races of the year. Good luck to those racing Seven Springs tomorrow. This is the first year in at least 6 that I have not been there. Sad. BUT anxious to get rubber on new dirt and once again get my knobbies on Vadge (Virginia) dirt. Can't wait to see all my hundie brothers and sisters. Good times. Also good luck to those racing out in Utah at the PCP2P and my man Dancin' Rick. Who is racing a 12 hour this weekend. Good luck brother.

Time to chill with my peeps (Wifey and B-Man) and have a few beers to make me think that doing ONE more hundie this year is a GOOD idea!

Later.

Sweet Relief

Sweet relief came in the form of some quick, expert wrenching by LBoH at Pro Bikes today and quick loop at Boyce to blow the funk out of my legs and give the Dos Niner a shake down ride for the SM100.

Last night my brakes were making a hay-noose noise and I was NOT feeling the love for my Dos Niner's Fox fork. But a quick stop by the shop and Tim (Little Ball of Hate) found the problem to be a jacked up spring in my rear brake. And the shock was just some simple adjustments that had me back on the right track. Thanks Tim!

The ride was a short and quick 12 mile loop just to keep the legs spanky to make sure the bike was rolling good for the weekend. The trails were so dry and so hard packed (for the first time this summer??) that they made the Ignitors feel like I was rolling big giant monster truck mudders. It was fun though, that's for sure. I hope this dry weather continues through next week and I'm not too wasted from the SM100 to enjoy copious amounts of brain massaging single track.

Did up a post on a the XXC blog today. There's a cool movie that looks to be coming out in the future. Check it out!

Later.

A Commuting Rant (At A Risk)

No ride today, just mag work, house work, dad work, plus making a run to the shop to get my wheel that Little Ball of Hate worked on. Would have been a perfect day for riding but I mentally scheduled a Tuesday/Thursday/Friday ride week with the SM100 on Sunday to destroy me.

Trade show season is starting. I always dig/loathe when Eurobike and Interbike come rolling around. I dig it because we get to see all the new sweet and juicy rides coming out in 2010 and all the killer parts we think will make us faster. But at the same time I HATE (and I know I'm risking sounding like a dick here) seeing all the over the top shit that the shows bring. As well as all the fixie bikes, freak bikes, and the endless parade of bikes marketed as "commuter bikes". Bikes that look like something the German Wehrmacht would have used to roll into Poland on.

Most of the folks I know (at least here in the U.S., Europe is different bike friendlier animal, like an Otter or something) that commute use an old beater bike so as to not have their good bike inevitably stolen by some crack head or destroyed after they're run into a big ass city curb when they try to "share the road" with some small dicked road raging douche bag driving a gas guzzling Hummer.

That isn't to say folks shouldn't commute or that companies shouldn't make bikes that would make great commuter bikes. I LOVE when I hear about and see folks commuting. BUT in my opinion (which really means nothing at all) the best commuter bike is an old cross bike, road bike (and even some mountain bikes). The best way to get an old cross bike or old road bikes is make NEW, better, well spec'd and well priced bike that people want to buy. Then if you're a company like say Trek, you have Bontrager market parts and accessories to spiff up the old stuff making them more commuter friendly (fenders, bags, mounts, etc.,).

Bikes shops in turn make a littler more cash off selling/installing the parts and can get hold of a little more new and spanky inventory to convince Mr. or Mrs. Soiled Chamois that he/she should really get a new ride for Cross season and turn that old cross bike into a flat barred, fender mounted, pannier using, Wehrmacht style commuter to get his/her ass to work on, or to the corner shop for a sixer and a taco.

The new bikes could possibly be lower priced and spec'd better because the company is not pouring R&D cash, etc., into a market, that in the U.S. at least, has to be an under utilized and under appreciated commuter market. Believe me I'd love to live in a society where to get to work or to the store I just hop on my bike and roll. But sadly we all don't live in bike friendly towns with bike loving folk. Some folks live in places where locals would throw a Big Gulp at you for fun, or scream at you to (and I am indeed quoting on this one) "get your f*cking ass off the road you f*cking piece of shit!!" when they see you rolling on a busy road.

I would apologize for the rant, but I'm not really ranting about anything. Just having some mental diarrhea about marketing and trade shows that overflowing with too many bikes that sadly will go unsold.

I think I need to ride more.

Later.

Dirt. It's Like Mothers Milk

After B-Man was off to school today, I sat about, goofing off and posting this and that on the XXC blog (something I'm trying to be better about doing lately), and realized that I continue to have a tough time getting motivated these past few weeks. It's all mental, 'cause once I'm ON the bike I feel great and am always glad I went. Despite the hesitation, I readied my bottles, bike, and buttocks to ride, although I will admit to waffling through the entire process. But once I was in the xB, with Foals on the iPod and heading to Boyce I felt much better and started getting that tingly feeling.

Sadly when I finally got rubber on dirt I felt like the fat kid in gym class. UG! BUT after a few miles I shed my inner fat boy and soon found myself suckling the dirt like it was nectar from the bosoms of Ma Natures teet.
Today was a bee-A-utiful day. The sun that seems to already be taking on a more golden fall color, and perfect trails, made even more perfect from what I believe was a recent PTAG work day. They really kicked ass on some drainage issues that a few of the trails had been having. Big thanks to them. I also took some rebound off my Fox today, I felt like it was too bouncy. So I slowed it down and it seems to keep control a bit better. Thankfully, 'cause I need all the help I can get on the trails these days.

I almost got taken out by a fat Kamikaze ground hog. I was cruising one trail at a nice 11 mph or so and out of nowhere comes this fat ground hog darting out just inches from my wheel.

I let out and audible "holy shit!" which was surely heard through the woods. What a mess if that thing would have got caught in the spokes! Yikes!

Took a couple newer to me connectors, hit the little ridden (by me) Wave Pool Trail and then did some stuff in reverse of my norm, which is sort of like doing new trails or like using the opposite hand for self gratification or eating. Yeah, eating, that's it

OK, I feel like this has been a successful post and I've wasted enough of your time. There was a 2+ hour ride to talk of, a photo from said ride, the word "teet" was used as well as the ever popular term "self gratification", and animal photos were doctored. Those are really the keys to a successful blog post kids. Take my word for it, I didn't get to be the 2,010th most popular cycling blog by talking about my mad skills and race wins!

Time to chill, eat some dinner, and maybe even have a beverage.

Later.