How To Go Nowhere Fast

This past week was a less than stellar training week...

HOLD ON!!

I need to vent on myself... I hate to use the term "training" anymore, not sure why I ever did? Maybe at one time I thought I was training to do something, and maybe I DID? All I know is now I ride bikes because I love it. "Training" is when I force myself to do stupid shit (to me) like ride the trainer, walk/jog on a treadmill or lift weights, so I can not make a complete and utter fool of myself when I do sign up for a race or go on a ride. The rest is just... riding my bike.

When I get to ride outside you will never see me do hill repeats (although at one time I did, ug!), force myself to keep my heart rate in a certain zone, or waste precious ride time doing intervals anywhere but on the trainer. I am, as my profile says- A Junk Mile Specialist. Of course, you also will NOT see me on a podium anytime soon with this training philosophy. Then again, I think in 5+ years of racing I have been on the podium three times, one of which had no prize, and no podium, so I guess I have to call it twice).

I do not look at my bikes, any of them as training tools anymore. I think that's one of the reason I've been off the road bike for so long. I started looking at it as a training tool and not a vehicle for exploration and fun on two wheels. I love my Salsa Campeon, but I guess I sometimes feel when I'm on my mountain bike (any of them), I feel like I'm on MY bike, the bike that will take me places and see new things. The bike I feel is "me." OR I'm just a lazy f*ck, know full well my Campeon needs tuned up, a new front derailleur and a bunch of other worn out shit replaced, so I ride my mountain bikes all the time.

Don't get me wrong I have some VERY loose training philosophies that I subscribe to, but not one person, racer or coach would dare agree with them. Don't care. I basically build a base, then do shorter tempo rides (off road and on), do some easy rides, do some rides that mimic a race or two, and take some days off. Don't go hard the week of a race, enjoy long rides in the mountains, enjoy carbo loading as much as possible, rest when I feel tired, and ride far when I don't. I race races I dig, when I can, and finish what I started as often as I can. I ride when I can, mostly by myself, and around family commitments and real life first.

OK, now that we know that I pretty much ride when I can and try not to suck, we can return to what I was talking about...

I got no "real" hours in. I did what I could, when could. I will say the week did suck hard, since the week before I had over 10 hours of saddle time. Oh well, I'm not gonna beat myself up about not getting some real rides in, in late January, I have PLENTY of other things to beat myself up about.

I do hope to get my cheeks in the saddle this week and in the woods, but if not... there is always a race or two to set my sights on and get me through those indoor workouts.

Later.

Laid Back...

Another pretty laid back day here. No riding. B-Man was off shool today which meant I was 100% on as Stay-at-Home Dad. All good, we had a blast.

The best lines from today...

Me: I am nothing but a human onion...
B: I'm throwing up in here people!!!

How I know. Why? I do not. The only thing better was B-MAN once again telling me the difference between fiction and no fiction books. Kindergarten people. He's KILLING ME! I did get a few pages of XXC 2.1 done today, but not much else.

Other than that my time was spent thinking about a frame or two, and planning out 210 race wise. I think this might be it...

3/7 - Camp Hilbert 5 Hour, Maidens, VA*
4/17 - Leesburg Bakers Dozen, Leesburg, VA
6/12 - 12 Hours of Big Bear, Bruceton, Mills WV
6/26 - Hilly Billy Roubaix, Morgantown, WV
7/31 - NUE - Wilderness 101, State College, PA
9/5 - NUE - Shenandoah 100, VA

Who knows what will and won't pop up, I really don't care. My goal from here on is to do races I WANT to do, and for no other reason. Some of the above may not happen. Don't care. What I DO care about is having fun on my bike, getting some long ass rides in, and seeing some cool things. What else is there?

Later.

*Tentative

Nothing To Give. Nothing Got.

My sleeping is now so f*cked up, I think the only thing that can help is some livestock grade tranquilizers and grain alcohol. Instead of waking up every morning at 4 AM and not falling back to sleep, I now wake up every morning at 3:40. Nice four hours or so of sleep, made for a VERY sluggish morning.

But as I coffeed up (thank God for java, or I would be dead), and got some work done on a mag layout on a certain Pennsylvania based stage race going down this spring, I started getting a second wind. Or I guess a "first wind."

So to the Stankment® I went!! I wanted to get a quick workout in before having to get back to work, 20 minutes in and I knew I had nothing.... Just an empty tank of sleepless suck. So I tanked it, got a shower, and made a call to TSC to see about those tranquilizers.

I think it MIGHT be time to ditch my5 year old Hammer Nutrition shorts. They are so thin they fit me like a nice pair sheer panties... oh wait... shit... I mean they are just THIN!, and my winter goal of gaining a pound every two days is really taking a toll on them. Goodbye Hammer shorts... Goodbye....

Oh well, need to finish up some work, hang with the now home from school B-Man, look at the un assembled treadmill in my living room (don't ask!), and try to stay warm (it's cold as a witch tit here!). At least my toes are warm with the sockies I usurped from Wifey :)

Later.

Slogging Through

The riding has been on the DL this week due to a bunch o'mag work. It's been cold as titz, the trails are/and/or should be in pretty good shape. Hoping that my knobbies will taste frozen earth in at least once in the next few days. Will have to be tomorrow or Saturday most likely. Not sure though.

I was able to stop over to ProBikes to pick up the Dos Niner today. It was getting some fork love and a few other sweet bits. The Fox was feeling a little sluggish and I was having trouble getting all the travel I wanted out of it, so to the shop it was... and a few days later Tim had it good to go. Thanks, as always Tim!

While I was there, for the hell of it, we put the Dos Niner as I race it up on the shop scale.. Came in at 25.8 pounds. For a large frame, with 1" of cush in my rear, a 100mm Fox, a smattering of X.O, XTR and X9, and some durable, lightISH, but not sick light wheels. This should serve me well for a while. I have something on my mind for later in the spring and summer's mileage. BUT, I need to check on some planets, their alignment, etc., etc., etc., If I does all work out, I'll be stoked, and I can get back to something like what I once had (but with man sized wheels, and a cooler MFG). I'll be stoked to have what I think (for me) is the sort of bike to ride up through what has to be (with some luck) will be an impending Apocalypse. If not, I have 25.8 pounds of Dos Niner to haul my God knows how many pounds of slack ass around some race courses this summer.

I love bikes.

Later.

Cigar Shaped Obects (a road ride)

A warm and toasty day in WPA with temps hitting he mid forties! Woot! Woot! Soooo, I gussied up my Mamasiata, and stuffed my ass and its burning bung (last night's dinner, may have been a TAD too spicy), into a chamois, layered up and hit some local back roads.

I had it in my mind I wanted to do the my newly mapped 50 mile ride, but it really didn't work out due to poor planning on my part. By poor planning I mean I didn't take enough hydration, and had to start heading back at about mile 35. BUT I still got in 3:40 and 43ish miles of saddle time in, and did a lot of nice 4 mph climbing.


As much as I used to riding the Mamasita on the road, the sluggishness of a MTB on the road in very apparent on a day like today. When I ride my road bike on the road, I pretty much do 40 miles and end the ride with some water left in my bottles. On a mountain bike the effort to get a knobbied, 26 pound, 29er up the steep ass climbs of WPA ghetto farm road make it a LOT harder. It might be time to get the Campeon back in shape. Maybe.

I didn't take the iPod today. Should have... got sort of bored without it. Didn't take enough water. Should have... I ran out. Should have worn less clothing. I didn't... got overheated much of the time, and in turn got pretty cold from all the sweat. FYI- I was sweating like a fat girls thighs, encased in the yeasty confines of a leather mini skirt.

I did do some newer farm roads today, and they were just great!!! I sometimes can't believe that there are such low traffic, buttocks fornicating roads so close to W.O. and the surrounding ghetto areas.


I had one sad-ish moment out on one of the farm roads. As I climbed a steep grade I looked over to see a dude in a wheel chair, no legs that I could see, just sitting in his driveway, sunglasses on, blankets on and just enjoying being out in the fresh air and the Vitamin D inducing sunshine. I felt bad for him, but then realised, that for all I know he's happier than me. I mean my late mother spent waaaay to many years not being able to move any part of her body below her neck, yet was one of the most positive, upbeat people I've ever met. Still, it's when you see folks like that, while you're out doing stuff like riding, that makes you feel lucky and thank God for the ability to ride. Even if it is, in my case, a pretty half assed attempt.

The purposed 50 that I was going to do is pretty much a series of figure eights, that weave to/fro to make up a nice 50. Having to ditch the last figure 8 was not a great feeling, but with little water and about 3 sips of Perpetuem left, I opted to error on the safe side and just head back to the xB. It was the right call. A great ride though... and in JANUARY!!!

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I stopped at Pro Bikes yesterday to drop the Dos Niner off for some fork love, and a new derailleur (the current one is two years worth of freaking shot!!) and other shit. While I was there I spied the new Specialized Epic 29er. I HAD to take if for a spin. BIG mistake. It was pretty freaking great. Stock it weighed in at 26.5 pounds. And let me tell you SRAM XX is the titz. Dear Lord!! The Reba felt pretty sweet on it too, and I'm not a Reba fan. I have to say it would be nice to have a twist shift option for the XX though. (Personal pref peeps.)

I am not sure I have what it take to run a FS bike, but with 2 to 3 12-ish hour races coming up in '10 it's a nice thought! I keep experimenting with them, but always end up unhappy, riding this one made me think that it was good the Spesh took so long to get on board the 29er train, because it seems like they got this one dialed in. It's a light weight endurance race machine for sure.

A swap to tubeless and and some lighter wheels would have the Epic down into a VERY respectable weight range. There will be a few racers out there on the Epic in '10 for sure. I'm 99.9999% sure I will not be one of them, being that the Dos is still running well, and the Mamasita does what's she's told.

BUT it is always nice to ride some other stuff. It's like going to a strip club. "WOW, she's hot!! Betcha she shags like a minx!!" Yeah, but you know she's high maintenance and out of your price range bro! Move along... Plus she's probably got Chlamydia. "But dude, they got medication for that shit now... right??

Did I mention I can barely move my "core" area. Freaking Mark Verstegen!! God it feels gooood though.

Later.

More Things I Said I Wouldn't Do

Sadly, no ride today. That sucks too, 'cause the sun was out and it had thing warming up a bit more than yesterday (40s!!). Had to finish up some stories, mail some swag, and other fun stuff.

I realized I failed to mention yesterday, that the past 3 rides, I did what I usually do NOT do, and that is ride with my iPod. I'm not really fan, or I should say... I had NOT been a fan. But I figured WTF? I only use one earphone in my right ear, and leave the left open to hear traffic, and motorists screaming obscenities at me.
So far it's been really cool to have some added motivation. Although the first ride, I took Wifey's little pink Shuffle** and I had it loaded ONLY with Motorhead, and ONLY with about 20 songs. FAIL! Lets just say after almost 3.5 hours, there are songs that I'll be fine with NEVER hearing again.

The next couple rides I took my iPod with a very much expanded play list. And was MUCH better. Note: Foals are just awesome to ride to.

Not 100% sure if I could ride in the woods with one, I sort of like to hear what the woods and the mountain are saying. It's good for the head, the mind, AND the brain (comically and karmically speaking of course). I MIGHT be able to race with one ear bud in, at least after a few laps when shit gets boring.

So file all this in the Big Bin Of Things Jason Said He Wouldn't Do along with use front suspension, night ride, ride a 29er, ride a full suspension, wear bib shorts, get a road bike, ride a mountain bike on the road, wear a thong, etc., etc.,

On the plus side of today, I mapped out a 50 mile local ghetto back road loop. So that is pretty sweet. BTW have you checked out the Google Earth "fly over" option on MapMyRide.com? Freaking cool!

Later.

**Please note that the Pink Shuffle is NOT an Official Don Powers Approved Manly Cycling Accessory. Along with mountain bikes ridden on the road, and soon to be riding with more than one gear and/or front suspension. Use at your own risk, lest ye be mocked by Don.

The Junk (Miles and Parts)

Today was a bit colder than I wished,
but it was warm enough to get out on the bike.

Because of the colder temps and a later start, I pretty much knew that I would not be out for as long as I had the past 2 rides (3 and 3+ hours), but I still wanted to suffer a tad. So I sought out some new roads and some new climbs for the loop and they paid me back with some shnozz to stemp, lower back killing, ready to stroke out type climbing... and I was on a freaking mountain bike!! And no, I didn't use my granny. I refuse to take the granny bail out on the road, it's just not allowed. Yet. A few more pounds and a few more years and we'll talk.

Beacause cameras can be road distorting little pricks, the above shot does just NOT do this road justice. One of the smoother roads of the day, but freaking STEEEP. DAMN! I hostestly don't think I could ride it on my road bike, even with a compact. OK, I could, but it would hurt even worse.

The pic above illustrates perfectly why as of late, I prefer my Mamasita on my new road loops. The ride is broken up into the following (in no real order):

1. Rough pot holed filled WPA roads. 2. Mud covered farm roads (seen above) 3. Ash, salt, dirt, stone, pot holed, mud covered, supposed to be paved (I think!), back roads, and 4. Smooth roads that STILL manage to be a mess. If I had a cross bike I would most certainly use it on these loops, but I don't, so the Mamasita it is.

The ride clocked in at just 2:20, but there was still a bit of suffering, and CRAMPING! Who the f*ck cramps in 35 degree temps?? Frig.

Speaking of the Mamasita, I did some "experimenting" with grips and bar ends today. I am of course a HUGE fan bar ends, and of course Ergon grips... They are titz. BUT the one thing I'm not 100% crazy about is the shape and texture of the Ergon bar end. So I figured I'd jack around with some old grips and my fave bar ends. The bar ends are an OLD pair of (pre Stumpy) Controltechs (I think) cut down and capped. They are my faves.

Anyway, my winter gloves are just not loving the ultra smooth Ergon bar ends, and tend to slip a bit and as I mentioned I don't really dig the shape, so I swapped them out last night for the CTs. As I thought the Controltechs rocked for climbing and in overall performance. BUT, also as I expected, the grips were about 20% as good as my Ergons (shock!).

In a perfect world I could use my Ergon grips with these perfect stubby little bar ends. But try as I might I can't figure out how. I asked Ergon, why their bar ends have that funky curve. They said it was determined to be more ergonomic. Hmmm. Anyway, I am 89.2% sure that I will be putting the Ergons on before the next ride, and 99.999% that they will be on before the next mountain bike ride.

Oh well, if you can't experiment with junk this time of year, when can you?? What I may do is just add some grippy tape to the Ergons for the winter, then when the temps warm up, and I can feel the bar ends better, ditch it. Just a thought.

CHALLENGE: Ergon grips are HUGE, I mean folks just LOVE them. I challenge a company to come up with some aftermarket bar ends that fit the Ergon grip lock on set up. I promise that I will buy a pair if you do.

OK, this post is way too long, about way to little.

Later.

I Swear It Was An Accident Doc!

Not mucho going down today bike wise, or maybe I should say "ride wise" since there is ALWAYS something bik going down. Today I finished laying out 98% of a damn cool article for XXC 2.1, tied up some other bizness related things, and worked on the bike a bit.

Needed to clean up the Mamasita a bit, and do some bar end adjusting. As I'm leveling the bar ends etc., I squat down, and came WAYYYYY to close to having a handle of a floor pump penetrate RIGHT through my "fat pants" and up the ol' pooper. I can just IMAGINE going to the Doc about THAT. "I swear it was an accident!! That's bike grease on it, I SWEAR!!!"

Speaking of floor pumps.... my fave floor pump (not the one that almost cleaned out my colon, but my Topeak JoeBlow PRO, seems to have shit the bed. It still pumps air, but the PSI gauge seems to have died. Anyone ever have any issues like that? Not sure what the deal-i-oh is. Any info would be appreciated. The whole reason I dig the Topeak JB is because I of the easy to read and accurate enough gauge. Now I have to go with freaking "hand feel!!" WTF? It's like a million dollar pump. OK, that's a lie, but it is pricey for a pump.

Gotta split.. I need some "me time."

Later.

3 More For The Cause

After a great 3+ hours of saddle time on Saturday, and a day off yesterday, I was looking forard

to more time on the bike today. The plan was to go out for a 2 hour loop, but if I felt good extend the time and try to get another 3 hour ride in. Mission accomplished.The temps weren't bad at all, in the 40s and no precip. The thing I hate about riding in cooler temps is that I start out cold, get hot, get cold again, get hotter, freeze, then the ride ends. I have a a boss pair of Endura gloves but I think my problem with them is that my hands get too hot and sweaty, then the prolong time in the cool air make them feel COLDER than they should. If the temps could be more regulated, I would be happier, but I was NEVER "too cold" to enjoy the ride.

It's actually kind of cool riding the WPA back roads this time of year... they're pretty rough and shitty anyway, but after several weeks of snow, and tons of ash, salt, and God knows what (I think I saw part of a human hand) thrown on them, they're are ALMOST like riding forest roads.

The shot above is a sign of some of the slop that I rode through today on the road. No complaints, it was fun, but a sign indeed. My face, frame, body, etc., looked about the same. I will say this for the Maxxis CrossMark. They roll FAST on pavement. But I have about as much confidence in them to handle muddy, gravel corners and switchbacks as I do in my abilty to take a punch, or go more than 10 minutes without thinking something negative.

In other words, I'd rather have a balls out slick, or a balls out mountain tire than these suck tires. Not bad on hard pack trails, but ssskkketch on gravel/salt/ash covered pavement. But then again, I'm the dofuss riding his mountain bike on the road, while his titzy road bike sits in the Stankment® on the trainer.

I SHOULD have been working on laying out XXC #6's first story today, but I was having trouble with TOO many ideas for the story. It's a good one, and there are LOTS of design options for it. I have a feeling I will be working on this one for a while.

Time to chill with some chicken and pesto and maybe hork a glass of wine from Wifey's stash to chill.

Later.

Blown Stink

Oh sweet Lord, YES!! Temps in the 40s, melting snow, and rideable roads.

I was NOT gonna pass this opportunity up to get some base in the legs, so I busted out the Dos Niner, and headed to the gritty, salt, ash, sand, and shit covered ghetto farm roads near my house. In a word: Titz. In two words: The Ballz.

Got a sweet, at often time taxing 3:15 in. And it felt so freaking good, I thought I was gonna have to smoke a cigarette or something afterwards, or at least sneak out of the apartment and avoied any uncomfortable morning after small talk.

Did a BIG PIMP job on the Dos Niner's top tube...

Rolling proudly, and flying the colors on the back roads of WPA.

Hills,ice, hills and more hills were the order of the day as blew the cabin fever stink right off me. Nothing like 3+ hours of climbing, on knobbies, on the road, in chilly temps to tax the legs. Again, it felt GOOOOD. Did I mention it felt good?

Later.

Not Much

After a week of XC skiing, time on the trainer and 12+ hours a days in front of the computer, just to go 2" ahead and 1 foot back with every stroke of the key, it was time to SORT OF chill today with less work, Zone 2 on the trainer, and some beers tonight whilst watching Blood, Sweat and Takeaways on Planet Green. Good times....

Planet Green has become one of my fave channels, and I don't know why?? I dig the programs and shows the most, but I'm not what one would call "green" by any stretch. I mean I dig my hair care products, have no real beef with global warming, if that means riding in shorts in January (which it doesn't,'cause shit's still cold and snowy here!!), but the channel is like the "new" BBC. They show good documentaries, good shows, and as far as I can tell NO "Dancing With The Stars" type shows. I think Plantet Green and the Travel Channel are now my most watched networks on TV. Of course I still watch my fair share of the train wreck of human suck that IS The Jersey Shore from time to time.

I hope to get out tomorrow for a couple/few hours on the bike. Hope of the road side ice melted today. So as not to die tomorrow.

Later.

Double Post (Sort Of)

My alter ego (xxcmag.com) has a new post up on how to help out some kids and in return get a digital copy of XXC #5 for free. Rather than do a double post, I figured I'd just post a link. HERE.

Later.

Wasted Days

I hate to waste a day and that is what I felt like I did today, work wise. I worked my ass off, and for nothing. I could go on and on about it, but this is a bike blog, not a blog about a graphic designer that freaking HATES web design, and the fact that freaking knowing some bull shit secret nerd speak, Spock code, is what determines how something functions/looks. Just sayin'. BTW, no offence to any of my nerd readers. I'm just a moe-ran.

{fu-repeat% repeat-fu% hate*}
{url name: http://code: c,a,n,-SUCKit}

So I spent 8 hours holed up in my office (or spare bedroom with a computer in it, if you want to split hairs) and got NO freaking workout in of any kind. Enter one frustrated, soon to be slob.

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I'm accidentally off sugar and really diggin' it. Yep, Monday I went to pour my Tub O'Coffee and saw we were out of the white goodness. So I reached for the tolerable, but not the same Stevia. Each Tub I get it more dialed in, and now I think I'm actually preferring it to the over the top taste of sugar. The key is to not use as much as you think you need. A little goes a long way.

_____________________

Getting anxious to figure out some races this year. Normally I obsess about this from November until April, but my "semi retired" (code for not giving a shit) attitude, finds me waiting a bit longer to obsess. I mean I can't beat the race bug, but I can at least battle it back a bit. I thinking a 13, a hundie or two an a 24 might do me nicely. Which ones(other than the LBD) are not known to me right now, but I'm thinkin'.

Also, I got some me some El Mariachi on the brain for '10. Not sure that will happen, but I might not be able to control the lust. Like I've said before, being married is bad enough (just kidding baby, I love you!), no need to be all "married to a bike." What's a semi retired, never really WAS a racer type person to do? Hmmmm.....

Time to go check out some schedules, some calendars, and then get stare blindly at Dreamweaver for 30 minutes to 8 hours willing it to do something.... ANYTHING. LOL!

Later.

p.s. every time I typed "semi retired" I wanted to type semi retarded. Freudian slip of the truthful kind I suppose.

No. 2 Down

For as much as I hate winter, bitch about it, and get grief from teammates for not riding in it (DON!), once I do get out and do winter type activities like XC skiing, I do dig it. I also dig breaking up the week by alternating between time in the Stankment® on the trainer, doing some light weight lifting (when motivated enough that it doesn't just seem stupid) and being outside.

Even if I suck at it (that means I fall a LOT, can't really steer that well, and knock down my fair share of saplings by straddling them with my snow covered nuggets), it's still nice to be out. Even nicer is the fact that I don't have to drive and hour to do it, just down the road, and up the hill to the park and hit some of the trails.

As luck would have it (good or bad?) it seems the temps are warming up a bit, and taking us into sort of a "no mans land" of conditions. Snow will start to get slushy than icy, the sides of the roads will be littered with frozen slush, and the trails will be a little too covered with some snow for good riding. Probably rideable, but not great conditions. Might get out, might not.

My days have been pretty busy mapping out XXC Season II, Issue I right now. Fingers crossed it all comes together, but it looks like we'll have stuff from Germany, Chile, the South West & South East U.S., and a couple places in between. It just needs ALL come together. It will, it always does.

Gonna be signing up for one of my fave races of the year this weekend, so that should keep me motivated to keep on keepin' on the bike, the trainer, and watching the food intake (which is going well).

Time to do some work.

Later.

Radom Web N'at

STILL sore from Sunday's ski. Imagine that! Feels good in a freaky way. What did NOT feel good is using those same tired and sore legs to get some LT intervals in today. Burrrrrrn!

Been in some random web hell lately. I'm not a fan of design on the Internet. Or at least I'm not a fan of CREATING it. So I look for quick WYSIWYG type programs (iWeb, Freeway Express, Blogger) to do that part of my job.

Other than some minor type issues with Safari and iWeb, my biggest beef with using iWeb is that blogging with it really sucks. It takes too long, too easy to screw up fonts, etc, and you have to manually insert comment boxes. Plus, unless you have a lap top, there is no way to blog on the road, etc.,). I've done over 1,600 posts on Blogger. It's easy, I'm used to it. I went back to it for my XXC blog. I can get way more done, do it quicker and save time for working on the important stuff like the mag. In time I will gradually upgrade the template, etc., but for now I'm not gonna worry about it. Just enjoy the ease of it.

So if you had the old iWeb XXC blog bookmarked, or on a feed or something, it will no longer be updated. It is integrated (enough) with the XXC site, so it should be no big deal. Got some newer stuff up on it today, including some blathering about the new XXC Magazine jerseys.

BTW saw this slow-mo from Cross Nats out the on the web. Check it out. Credit goes to FARfromEARTH Films. HOLY HD!

Hope to maybe get a ski in tomorrow. Or should I say I hope to go flail my arms and legs around inevitably roll down a hill or two with skinny skis stuck to my feet? :)

Later.

Giving In

I gave in to the snow today. Winter wins.

I dug out my XC skis and headed to W.O. Park to hit some trails. Nothing big, I mean I need to eeeeease into the skiing so as not to end up a cripple tomorrow (which may happen anyway).

I kitted up, whilst B-Man snapped pics, believe me I was freaked out too, I edited out the pics of me in various states of undress (those will be available for $4.00 on www.holycrapthatmanissofatandgoingxcsking.com later) and settled on this one...

That's some sexy shit. Photo by B-Man.

I drove up to the park and started by Angora Gardens. Parked the xB in the small empty lot, started unpacking and putting my boots on when a County Park cop pulls in. I loathe the park police. So when he stops by me, I just KNEW something wank was gonna come out of his mouth. And I was right.

Park Copper: Can I ask you a question?
Me: Sure, what's up?
Park Copper: Why are you parking in this lot?
Me: Ah.... Because I'm going for a XC ski, is there a problem?
Park Copper: No, but you know Angora Gardens is closed on Sunday's, right?
Me: To tell you the truth, I have no idea what "Angora Gardens" is. I just want to go for a ski, and this is a good place to park... yada, yada, yaday, "no problem, I just have to ask, that's my job," etc., etc.,

I mean, what the f*ck?? 99% of Allegheny County employees are notoriously lazy, and could give a f*ck about their jobs, but the Parks Police are ALWAYS on the freaking job. DON'T RIDE AT NIGHT, DON'T PARK THERE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?...

Freaking using the park!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Don't give us a park if you don't want people using it!!! Better yet, if you don't want people parking in the park PARKING lot to USE the park, put a freaking gate up with my freaking tax money!

I wanted to tell him that I was actually there to smoke a big bowl of hash that I just smuggled into the country, and plant pipe bombs all over park to kill would be dog walkers (who we all now are American Capitalist Pig Dogs). I mean what the f*ck did it LOOK like I was doing with skis, poles, and a silly ass outfit??

UG!

Oh well, dude was nice enough, but I'm just sick of anytime a park cop talks to you it's about something f*cking stupid. How about saying "it's nice to see folks using the park and not just coming up here to spray graffiti and drink bad beer." Anyway... back to blog, rant off.

I hadn't been on skis in 5 years. Sad, I know. Not a fan of winter, but I HAD to get outside, and riding my bike was just not gonna happen. Sure I COULD have rode the trails, but I would have just thought the whole time "this would be great if I wasn't freezing my ballz off and riding in 7 inches of snow!" So I skied.

The ski was only about 50 minutes, but the HR was UP (yes, I wore a HR monitor to XC ski. Sad.) And since I'm a really BAD XC skier, my HR is ALWAYS up. I was sort of shocked how quicly my mediocreness came back to me, even after 5 years off of skis. I still suck, but it was fun, I was working hard and ENJOYING the snow, something I RARELY do.

I had few spills (as you can see above), and I was hurting at first (freaking arches of my feet!!), but then it started coming together. I had a blast and was stoked to have a sweet place to ski for an hour right down the street. EVEN if freaking Rosco P. Coltrane had to give me grief at the start.

Going up... I actually followed two other sets of tracks today.
Nice to see some other locals were out enjoying the park.

Anxious to get back this week for some more time in. Today was a nice reintrocuction to the XC sking. Time to start building up and working on some skills.

Once home a hot shower and some couch time were in order and you could here the sound of me being sssssssssssssucked into the movie "Big River Man" from miles around. This one of the best movies/documentaries I've seen in YEARS! I could not move. The movie was titz!

I HAVE to see this movie again. It was freaking gripping. The dude is sort of messed up, but it was still an amazing movie. Very well done too.

That's it.

Later.

That's One Fine Chicken Sammich!

4:15 Thursday afternoon I left W.O. for my attorney's house in Charleston, WV. At 5:00 it started snowing. By 5:30 I was moving at a top speed of 40 mph on the interstate, with the death grip on the xB's wheel. Many "oh shit, I can't see the road!" moments later, and a few skids and spins later I arrived at said attorneys house and gave it all I had to get the xB up the big ass hill and into his driveway without tipping over.

8 hours later my attorney and I are up, eating eggs and packing the xB to head to Georgia for Southern Cross II. The weather forecast sort of deteriorated for Dahlonega (which I believe is pronounced Dallllllllllonngeeeeeaieee, but I'm not real sure), and went from just witch tit cold to witch tit cold with a dose of snow. Great. Anyway, I had Brad (formerly known as my attorney) check e mails one last time JUST to make sure there were no last minute race up dates/cancellations before we left. There were none. Off we go... but first we need gas and cash.

Brad cashed up, I filled up and got some windshield washer fluid for the snowy drive, and we were off. 2 miles later my wiper line was apparently froze and none of the just bought fluid would come out. THUS I couldn't really see. So I stopped, tried to fix it- nothing. We continued on driving with about 10-20% visibility. Great.

An hour later we stop AGAIN to try to fix it. Nothing. Some dude in the parking lot suggests adding a little bit of alcohol to the fluid. Who are we to argue with a random trucker type dude giving out advice at gas stations. So we stopped at a Lowes to buy some sort of shit to put in it. Still nothing. Frig.

The best moment came as Brad and I are both hunched down, trying to see out the window, traveling at 70 mph, with snow, and salt blowing at us. We were approaching two tractor trailers at warp speed with some death metal song of Brad's blaring from the xB's hi-fi. Brad just casually says "This is how we're going to die."

Four hours and several hundred miles later, we entered the sunny, snowless North Carolina. A few miles later the washer fluid FINALLY comes and I can see!! Frig yeah!!! Now that we can relax a bit, Brad checks his voice mail messages. He says "the race is canceled." I of course think he's joking and he says again "NO, the f*cking race is cancelled, turn around!" I STILL don't believe him, so he hands me the phone and sure as shit, it was Eddie telling us the race is postponed do to snow at the venue and safety concerns. Great.

We're sort of in shock, and VERY much in f*cking North Carolina!! LOL! So we travel down the road a bit, stop at a Chick-fil-A, eat, get some gas and do ONE BIG GIANT U-TURN to head back to Charleston.

How far will YOU drive for a chicken sandwich??

So NOW what?? I'm feel like an old man from being in the car for 8 hours, but Brad suggests we go for a snowy night ride at Kanawha and then drink some beer. I am less than thrilled of the idea of riding... I just wanted to sleep. BUT I was pretty stiff and of course wanted to earn some beer calories. He promised it would be low key, so I caved.

Once home we kitted up and headed to the park. The now was deep, the trails which are known for being damn technical were even more so with several inches of snow on them. BUT they were forgiving to the body upon impact!

The ride was more of a hike for me. My brakes weren't really working in the snow, but it was damn fun and a hell of workout. It wasn't all that long, but t was damn nice to get out and do something after being in the car for 8 hours.

Then there was beer, pizza, Rock Band (God am I bad at it!!), and watching cycling movies until 3:30 a.m.. Even though we only rode for about 1:20, and the conditions were less than ideal, we somehow managed to turn the day into and endurance event of our own. It was a great time, and I thank Brad and K-Schmalz for their generosity and hospitality.

Disappointed to miss the event. I hope Eddie can get it rescheduled for folks. If rescheduled, I can't imagine that I will make a second attempt at it this winter. I think my travels (read finances) are done until spring. I would like to bitch, but we were just on the business end of Snow Miser totally destroying us (in a pants down, "are you using the whole fist??, over the barrel sort of way). Even if the roads to the venue would have been good I can't imagine the course roads at higher elevations would have been too safe for racers. Oh well, we tried to race, but succeeded at having a good time despite some bad luck.

Later.

Going South

Heading south for some winter racin'. I wish I could say it will be warm. It won't be. BUT it will be time on the bike in the mountains with a bunch of freaks. Hope to have all my digits and able to type up a report come Monday.

Later.

Speaking Of Southern Cross...

Spent the a.m.. tying up some loose ends with the XXC kit design/order/etc., look for some details on how to pre-order some gear in the coming days or next week.

Then it was on to some web design "self teaching" in Photoshop and Dreamweaver, God I LOATHE what the Internet did to designing shit. Freaking code! Numbers, dots, blips and slashes to create?? WTF?? I thought WordPress would be the ticket for a nice blog/site, but it's just as complicated and God knows what does what?? They could make it just a LITTLE simpler! A friend turned me onto a simple web design site, and at first I was digging it, but I wasn't digging what I felt were some limitations as I got deeper.

Photoshop makes the design pretty easy, and fooling around with DW and Fireworks is getting me CLOSER, but I just can't believe that currently iWeb is the easiest (and slowest, most finicky) WYSIWYG web design program. But having fun learning some stuff. Sorry for the bikeless rant.

Got an hour in the Stankment again today. I had it in my mind to go to W.O. park to XC ski, but then I remembered how sore etc., one can become after the first ski, so I figured I'd just hold off on that until after Southern Cross this weekend.

Yesterday on the trainer I watched the the Kalmthout WC CX race that I downloaded. I recently converted it to .mp4 so I could put it on the iPod and hook to the TV. HOLY CRAP! What a race! These guys were so freaking fast in the snow and slush! Super amazing to watch. I highly recommend it.

Speaking of the S.CX, .... I ran into ProBikes today to pick up a vat of Perpetuem I ordered (and thankfully came in today), and then find some feet/hand warmers in attempts to keep my toes from falling off on Saturday. So much for heading south to get miles in! Freaking high of 33?? LOL! At least the forecast improved from earlier highs of 27. I'll take every degree I can get!! Now if I can just keep said Perpetuem from freezing in my bottle....

Oh yeah, I swore off Perpetuem a couple years ago. Too many top tube vomit incidents. BUT as you see, I'm giving it another go. Want max calories in my liquid nutrition and the flavorless MIGHT just be the ticket. We shall see.

Tomorrow evening I will head to Mr. Sensitive Air Chuck Man's house, then Friday a.m. we will leave for the land of Bo, Luke, Daisy, Cooter and cold as titz, 50 mile cross races, that some people choose to do on their mountain bikes.

Gotta get the bike ready.

Later.

A Monday In Hell

Actually it really wasn't a hell, it just fit. Today was "Day One", where I get back to keeping track of my food intake (at least as much as/when possible) for a bit, get portions under control and try to shed the fall/holiday layer of flubber that I have enjoyed putting on. Curse you beer! Sweet, tasty, BIG beers!! Luckily we're only talking about 10 pounds (some days less depending on what kind of movements I've had, LOL!).

I can't imagine being one of the New Years Resolution types (God bless them) that stand atop the scale and find themselves 50 or 60 pounds overweight. I've been there (-100 bitches), I know it's tough, and I wish them luck. I just hope that anyone reading this that is in that sitch doesn't think they will do it with diet pills, whack job TV "experts" and fad diets. Eat good food, exercise, change you lifestyle and please give two giant middle fingers to fast food!

Fast food is like sex with a hooker. There's no work, it feels good at the time, but you will feel like shit afterwards, feel unsatisfied, and it could kill you. For the record I've never slept with a hooker. Although I'm sure I thought about sleeping with Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman, but I have a feeling that most hookers don't look like that. Just a feeling.

How I got from starting the "training table" back up to hookers, I'm not sure? Sorry. Anyway, it feels good to have some purpose to my eating again, and not just bellying up to the burrito trough like normally do. Speaking of burrito troughs and diets... THIS was brought to my attention today. What a bunch of shit. Meanwhile I've been to Taco Bell ONCE in my life and I gotta tell you the burritos were NOT that big. It was about as big as an average sized dog turd, and didn't take much better. You want good, fresh, healthy Mexican food? Make it yourself.

Back to the Monday In Hell...

Today was B-Man's last day of Christmas break, and Wifey (who usually has Monday's off) was working, so as to have Friday off and be home for B-Man (since I'll be off getting my Southern Cross on). Which left me in a work out conundrum. When would I get one in? Wifey wouldn't be home until well after 6, and I KNEW I would have lose interest in a trainer ride by that point. So I put plan 35-b into effect. Bring the trainer up from the Stankment, get my spin on and be there for B if he needed me. B-Man was sucked into his new Nintendo DS thing-a-ma-jig, so I mounted up in the living room, watched a Sunday in Hell on the tube, and got some big ring climbing intervals in. Thanks B.

So see it wasn't a Monday In Hell, it was a SUNDAY, and the only thing hellish was the amount of sweat that came off me due to the 70* temps of the living room, in contrast to the normal 50ish of the basement, "climbing" like a fool and going nowhere. Yikes! Yeah, I know I should have had the fan, but it was pain in the ass enough to drag the bike, trainer, etc, upstairs without fetching the fan from the attic too. Cheers to B-Man for chilling and playing while I got my workout in. He's been great to have home the past couple weeks, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't craving the routine of the school week. ;)

Anxious to get to the dentist tomorrow to FINALLY get my permanent crown put on. Good thing too, because I lost the tip of this one a couple days ago and it's hanging on by a thread and I look even more white trash than normal.

Later.

Preparing For A Deep Southern Freeze

Not much going on. Putting time in on the trainer, watching some cycling DVDs, and getting some bike shit together for next week's Southern Cross race. Seems strange to be preparing for a race with snow, ice and temps in the teens outside. I pray Georgia will be a LITTLE better come next Saturday. Right now it is NOT looking much better!!! Damn. I suppose all that climbing will keep me warm enough.

Other than that crap-oloa, just keeping busy with some web stuff and longing for a better WYSIWYG type web design program to come along for web morons like me.

Later.