The Want & The Need

Anyone who has read this blog over the years knows that I, like so many cyclists, love to get new gear for my bike. Not to mention getting new bikes and or frames. Funny thing is, that after so many years I find myself not REALLY wanting anything. OK, that's a lie. I WANT stuff, but most of the stuff I want, is just that; a want, not a NEED, not a must have and if I take a cold shower (or look at my bank account) it kind of goes away.

Sure there are lots of bikes I would LOVE to have, ride and or try out- in no particular order: Trek Top Fuel (yes a 26er) Fisher, er I mean Trek Superfly 100, Salsa Mukluk, Salsa Vaya, Cannondale Scalpel 29er, Specialized CruX Comp Disc Apex, Foundry Auger, and a few more here and there, but I have to say I am pretty lucky and content with the stable in my basement right now. Again, do I WANT another bike? Sure, that's part of being a bike nerd, and I wouldn't turn any of those bikes down if the opportunity presented itself, but hell, I don't ride all the bikes I have now! I mean my road bike hasn't left the trainer in over a year and I have no plans for it to do so anytime soon. I suppose if push came to shove and REALLY thought that I couldn't get through the winter with just my mountain bike and maybe some studded tires I would probably try to sell the road bike for a Mukluk. But that seems excessive for me right now. Last year the biggest limiter for my winter riding was ice, the slush and the cold. I think recognizing that better cold weather gear is probably what is needed more than a bike is where's it's at.

I also use to be sort of a parts whore- this is lighter, that rolls faster, that looks better, but now I find that I really only buy parts if they need replaced (not counting those TRP brakes I have on order at Terry's, IMHO the cantis HAD to be replaced). Hell I haven't even bought new tires for my mountain bike in over a year (Much to my friend D-POW's chagrin). My Maxxis Ignitors still have knobs, still hold air and have always played well with my Stan's wheels. Why fool around?

I also went through phases with nutrition: this gel will me faster, this one is better, this drink is GUARANTEED to prevent the bonk. This year: short rides got Powered Gatorade and plain water, longer races and rides got fueled CarboRocket 333. I hardly used any gels and when I did used what was in my race bag, or what was cheap at the store. Sure I've tried some great products like Kep's Pollen Balls and had some nice results when using Infinit Mud as pre ride and race fuel, but for the most part it was just Gatorade, water and 333. But I am also happy and content with my race and ride fuel. No need for weekly shipments of the next best thing, just to puke it up during the race.

Like I said I am VERY lucky to have some fine bike in my stable (my Spearfish is one of my favorite bikes in a long time), but 30 grams here, 40 grams there or shiny parts aren't going to make me any better right now. Riding, watching my weight and improved fitness will help me on the race course come spring though.

Then again a new bike is a nice motivator...

Later.

What A (Great) Day

After a night where I was pretty hopped up on Victory Storm King's (big props to The Store here in MP for getting it for me), I woke up to a headache and a cold rainy Saturday morning here in Mount P.

BUT...

After a long drawn out a.m. of some xxcmag.com work, a LOT of coffee and some breakfast I said "balls!" to the cold wet weather and headed up to MMCC around noon to ride. And in a word... it was the best.

I love that this glow in the dark skeleton. It has been hanging on this tree for over a year. I only now took a photo of it because of this being Halloween weekend. I also bit the head off a bat Ozzy style to celebrate, but the camera did not fire properly to catch my fat face ingesting the winged rodent. Sorry.

Temps were in the 40s and the trails were wet, but not muddy at all. There was some minor ass spay from the wet leaves, but for them most part it was an amazing day in woods in the saddle of the Spearfish.

The ride just ooozed fall riding. Crisp 40 degree temps, wet leaves, deer around every corner, etc., etc., It rocked.

I was shocked not to have run into anyone else today. I mean my friends (and enemies) in PA woke up to 1 to 3+ inches of snow today, I would have thought that my Michigan brothers and sisters would have been out. I mean really if you ask me, if you live in Michigan, anytime from October to April without snow on the ground is a HUUUUUUGE bonus.

Yep, just me in the lot today.

Somewhere in all those leaves is my trail. I dig this trial. Just an awesome trail to hammer, and then hammer some more.

This was the first ride that had to got with leg warmers and a jacket. I MAY have been able to get away with just my Craft wind front base, but went with the Craft jacket. No big. Also seen in the pic is my Spearfish. I love that bike. I remarked to a friend earlier tonight about the paint job on the Spearfish and how well it holds up. My frame looks as good today as it did the day I got it, and I have probably over 1,000 miles (or damn close) on it. That is something I could not say about some of my earlier Salsa frames. Note: I have pretty much been riding and racing only Salsa frames (except for my Jake The Snake gravel bike) since 2005. The Spearfish MIGHT have moved into my #1 spot.

Oh well. It was sort of ball suck week, but today was a fun day in the woods on my bike. That is best.

Later.

Word for word...

B-Man likes to write stuff on the Macbook's text thing-a-ma-bob, this is his latest project. Not that you care (at all, and it has NOTHING to do with cycling) but this is MY blog and seeing that he went from (this) to writing this makes me happy. And sometimes that is all it takes. Sorry. BTW, I can't believe he was ever that young and I was that skinny. God I got old fast. UG!

Anyway, here is what I found on my Macbook. He would be pissed if he knew I posted this, but hey, he's 7, there's plenty of time for him to find new things to hate me for. Take it away B-Man....

Tony Hawk is a professional skater.He can do tons of cool tricks.I have a game of him called: Tony Hawk Shred! It has a lot of levels on it.The game has about ten levels on it.You can do skate boarding and snow boarding on the game.I sometimes get frustrated with the game because the levels are hard,but thats what makes it fun. It also gets annoying a lot because another skater comes up and tells you what you'r doing wrong. I have unlocked three levels but the third level is hard.The third level has a part that when you go across the
bridge it blows up when you land it, well that is if you land it.If you don't land it you go down with the bridge. On all the levels I have unlocked at least once there is a part where you crush the road but in real life you would die. You get to unlock new characters and different costumes for the characters.I have the main
character:Tony Hawk.It comes with what looks like it is just a snow board but as I said before it does skating to. In the third level at the end you hit a gate but you don't crash. On a part before the gate there is a ramp that has a pipe through it and when you hit the gate it blows out water. I haven't unlocked the fourth level yet but it looks really cool.The board has sensors on the top,bottom,left and right.
On the back of the board it says Tony Hawk.On the front it has a yellow feather. Sometimes when they do a flip or something you can see the bottom of their boards.On the bottom of Tony Hawks board there is a hawk with a crown on it.I think its supposed to be a hawk king or queen or something. The board is mostly
red.The second level is pretty much a swirly slide but the biggest swirly slide ever.
It is also has a lot of jumps so that pretty much makes it the most broken swirly slide ever.Its not all a swirly slide…it has some ramps too.Sometimes it feels like I
am in the game.If it gets a little to hard I just play a different game.

This makes me smile. Thanks B-Man. Even though I won't show you that I copy/pasted this here for a few more years.

Later.

For Lack Of A Better Word...

Remember that term "Sucks donkey dong?" OK, maybe that was just popular with me and my unruly gang of low brow misfits back in the eighties, but if you do remember the term, or can at least imagine what sucking a donkey dong must be like (Tijuana hookers need not apply!!!), then you can imagine how this week equates to doing such an act (band in 41.2 of our great(ish) 50 states).

Why did it suck? Well not ONE pedal stroke has been taken outside my basement (as of 6:22 PM Friday night). That's good enough for me to = the mouth loving of donkey dong. Yeah, yeah, sure, sure there were a couple days I could have pulled up my big boy gutchies, endured the cold and wet and rode, but there was a lot of shit going on both personal and work related that prohibited such rascal-ish acts. To top it off I developed a big as your kid's thumb pimple on my my taint (fucker hurts like hell) and a sick B-Man home from school today with a 102 degree fever. UG! What's worse, a big ass pimple undaurballz or a sick kid?? A sick kid of course....

Sure, Wifey ended up taking the day off since she was up with B. most of the night, but it didn't seem cool to take off on a good for nothing ride whilst the boy had a 102 fever and the wife was trying to catch up on rest. Curse you vile germs, curse you!!!!!!!

So in the end it looks like me not signing up for tomorrow's 50 mile gravel race was a good idea, since Wifey will most likely have to go into the office tomorrow to prepare for Monday's hearings, etc., etc.,

Cuss!!! Or not. I really don't care. Someone will finish 53rd for me.

They are calling for rain and maybe some wet snow tomorrow, but I still might be able to sneak out for something quick at some point. Sunday is out because it's B-Man's last soccer game provided he's not still sick of course, but I would rather miss a ride than miss watching him tear up the pitch because he's ill. He rocks the pitch!!!

Next week is the Iceman. I was 90% sure I was not going to do it (even though I'm registered), but then my friend Danielle made me feel like shit (and that's a good thing) and shamed me into being 99% sure I'm doing it. Sure I'm in like the 24th wave of like 2.3 billion racers, but the chance to race the Iceman and hang out with some like minded VeloNerds™ might be too much to pass up. Not to mention a National Champion basically called me out. I can't let her skinny ass show me up on her Ti singlespeed (she will, by many minutes/hours). So it looks like I will be there next week rain, snow, ice, come what may.... racing and having "fun" with about 2,000 other racers. Viva le Iceman!!!

In other news I am on the Mukluk fence. I REALLY want to try to figure out a way to get one, but at the same time I can't decide if I should. I mean should I just get some BIG ass high volume, wide 29er tires for the Ti El Mariachi, or should I try to get my (Moose)mitz on a Mukluk?? There are miles upon miles of snowmobile trails here, and it would seem like a good fit, but I JUST...DON'T...KNOW if I should do it or not. Curse you Salsa!!!! Curse you vile WINTER!!!!!

So maybe I will get out on dirt this weekend (fingered and genitals crossed), but if not.... as Vince Lombardi once said... "what the fuck? It ain't no big deal."

Weight loss progress this week = Nothing. I am filled with hate. AND starving. SO I am drinking lot of beer to make up for it. Being skinny is overrated. I jest of course, gastric bypass beckons!!!

Later

Nothing To See Here, Move Along...

Wow, there is really nothing going on right now worth blogging about. Been doing a ton of updates at xxcmag.com if you are the sort that actually wants to read about cycling on a cycling blog. Feel free to check it out by clicking HERE.

I guess I could come up with something bike related... Ah, ummm.... I have a pair of TRP CX 9 brakes on order at Terry Cycles in beautiful downtown Alma.

Now I can finally get rid of the crap canti brakes and have something that is reported to have a bit more stopping power without a weight penalty. Then again, I am not sure that crap bike racers who move up a kit size every year should be worrying about the weight of their brakes. They should be in stock in a week or so, so hopefully I can give some feedback on how they compare to the crap cantis I have on the Jake The Snake now.

Not sure what I am doing the rest of the year race wise. I've sworn of cross, there's a 50 gravel grinder race this Saturday, but not sure I feel like it. I've done more than my share of racing this year and have just been enjoying the ride right now. I'm not even sure I am going to do Iceman. Lot of logistics involved that are proving to be a pain in my ass to race with 4,000 other people. Oh well, we'll see, we're creeping into the season that I (no so) affectionately call "warm bath and razor blade season" A.K.A. the trifecta of mental stress, hate, general self loathing and miserableness that is Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years, so I could use something to keep my mind occupied.

OK, this little love fest is over right now, got crap to do.

Later.

Unexpectedly Good...

Not much to talk of today other than a short, but fine ride out on the dirt roads this morning.

Snapped the pic above as I headed out today. This is downtown Mount Pleasant... the orange building is the local bike shop-Motorless Motion, A.K.A. "Mo-Mo", the building to the right is Marty's Bar, home to the worst beer menu in M.P., and of some of the strongest Gin & Tonics (amongst other drinks) in M.P., and a place were my wife has left with bruises on her legs. Long story... As you can tell downtown was VERY busy this Sunday morning.

Some of the roads were pretty ripped up from the recent rains, heavy equipment and Amish buggies, but for the most part the roads were pretty tacky. The back roads and farm roads of America' s mid west have have the reputation for being gravel, but truth be told, here in Central Michigan, most of the roads are straight dirt, which can be both a blessing and a curse.

This is what it looks like if you try to snap photos of a dog snapping at you as you ride by. I hate dogs. Oh, wait, I mean I LOVE dogs (note to self: DO NOT UPSET THE FREAKING DOG LOVERS). Seriously, I love dogs, especially the ones that shit in my yard, snap at me and rip through my Lycra with their teeth. They're SO cute when they do that.

I did a short 35 mile ride and tried hit the uber flat road since I was not feeling all that in to riding today. BUT the legs came around, and I got what I wanted which was another day of burning calories. According to the Polar I spent about 9 hours on the bike this week and burned almost 8,000 calories. Of course I put a ton back on this weekend courtesy of Founders and Bell's Brewing, but I think I STILL came out pretty good.

Rain moved in tonight and tomorrow is a rest/big work day, so I'll need to REALLY watch the fat/calories tomorrow.

That's a wrap.

Later.

Unreal (In a good way).

The weather this week sucked. It was cold and windy as hell and it pissed down rain most of the week and up 'till today I only got outside once. Which leads to today...

I had no real desire to head out on the dirt roads today, nothing against them, I just needed some real dirt... I needed singletrack. I headed up to the MMCC trails thinking that they would be the best bet for riding after a week of rain, which they were. But I was AMAZED that I rode 21 miles and there was not a spec of mud on me or my bike. FREAKY! But also FREAKING AWESOME!

I continue to be amazed with how the soil sucks up water here/there. The trees are pretty void of all leaves right now, and staring at the trail was like looking into a kaleidoscope, but luckily I ride there so much that it was pretty easy to follow the trail.

There were a few other folks out riding, but oddly I never saw them on the trail. Come fall, every ride without snow is a blessing.

Today's ride rocked, I should have rode 3 or 4 laps, but stopped happy and content with two laps of amazingly fun trails.

Later.

Blahhhhh, But I'll Take It. Thanks.

What a crap week. After an amazing summer and hardly any rain whatsoever, we had a week of cold, COLD rain (I swear I thought it was going to snow!!). I got out to ride gravel on Tuesday but the rest of my "training" was done indoors this week. I still burned a crap load of calories and watched what I ate and to tell you the truth, right now that is all I am concerned about right now; getting my lard(ish) ass thin(ish) again.

Having said that, I think I am forgoing the gym this year. I mean it's nice to get out of the house and see real people now and then (especially if that real person is that 21 year old thick assed fit chick on the treadmill in front of me) , but not sure it's worth the cash. I hate lifting weights (dumb), the stair master helps burn calories, but it's NOT a bike, and if I'm being honest, it's f*cking stupid (even though it sometimes is nice to do). I think I would rather just invest some money that I don't have in some new XC skis, maybe some snowshoes, and/or if the planets align and I fudge the family books enough (shhhhh!!!!! keep your mouth shut!!) a Mukluk and gear so as to embrace the winter and all it's snowy vile, wretched.... goodness, all it's snowy goodness... Winter's great.... I love it.... really.... I do, I swear.

It only took until about October 19th before I couldn't leave the house without a winter jacket, but I am happy. In fact this week marks my family's one year anniversary as Michiganders and marks one of the happiest years of my life. I shit you not. I know, that is freaking sssssstrange considering I was ready to take a rope to the attic (props to Jules) over moving here, but Mount Pleasant and central Michigan has stepped up and really given me everything I ever wanted... A small town that isn't TOO small, nice people, lots of racing (all within 2 hours max of MP), endless dirt and gravel roads to ride, low traffic pavement, a town that it's not uncommon to go just a few blocks and count more than 10+ folks riding bikes to work, the store, the bar, etc., (not that I did that recently) no matter what time of year or what the conditions. THAT is cool. Not to mention B-Man loves his school and Wifey LOVES her job here. Me? I can adapt and rock it no prob.

Will we stay here forever? We might, but I doubt it, but if we move again the place better have endless miles of low traffic pavement and dirt roads out my back door, lots of racing, good restaurants and bars within walking distance, friendly people, no traffic and be bike friendly. So why would I move again? The winter? Maybe. But I doubt.

Sure I miss my dad and I hate to leave my brother and sister towing the family line back in PA/WV on their own, but they have enough going on and we're different enough that I'm sure they could give an eph about what happens up here and with me. So thank you Mount Pleasant, and thank you Michigan for a great year. I hope year #2 is as good or better. Sorry I doubted you.

Hope to get some single track in tomorrow, we go a ton of rain here this week, but the soil here soaks it up damn nice.

Later.

Stick With What Works: Lessons Learned

Looking back at the this blog over the years, it seems that I've talked quite a bit about weight loss, weight gain, etc., I know that this comes from A. Spending the ages of 10 through 21 extremely overweight and being miserable and hating life and B. Losing the weight and falling in love mountain biking and racing, a sport that doesn't discriminate whether you are fat or skinny, hell there's even a Clydesdale class at most races, but it's sure easier when you are lighter. So gaining and losing weight has never been far from my mind since the age of 10.

For most of my true adult life (ages 21 and through 40) I have been skinny and it's been easy to be skinny. Then about 2009 I started gaining weight. A pound here, a few pounds there, and before I knew it 30 pounds has been added to my frame. The clothes still fit (although a bit more snug than in the past), and by American standards I AM still thought of as skinny (that is a sad reflection on our modern culture and current obesity rates). By bike racer standards and MY standards I am a now a Clydesdale. Not by much, but one nonetheless. I am not happy.

Welcome to the big boned class.
(Still digging Lazer helmets I see)

Some of the issues came with some medicine that I have had to take over the past few years, but most of it was my own fault. The stress of trying to run the magazine on my own, being a good husband, good father, working, riding and being by myself most of the day lead me to find happiness at the end of the day in making more comfort foods higher in fat and calories than I ever have (Jesus, I started buying bacon! BACON!!) as well as drinking way too much beer. The last time I found myself drinking too much beer was back in 2000 right after my mom died in December of 1999.

Over the past year or so I have experimented with going back to being a part time vegetarian, to trying the Paleo diet, to trying to eat high protein, good fats, and low carbs and none of it has worked. My metabolism just doesn't not work well with high fat food, even when it's "good fat." Wifey has recently had success with the low carb thing and has dropped about 10 pounds in just a couple weeks. I tend to just stay the same or gain weight when I do that.

So I am sticking with what works.

What works for ME is keeping track of calories and nutrients on TheDailyPlate.com (now A.K.A. Livestrong.com), cutting way back on fat (bacon, cheese, red meat), eating good carbohydrates (whole grains, fruits, vegetables), leaner meats (turkey and chicken breast) limiting red meats and having alcohol as a treat on the weekend. This is "normal" for me and combined with the amount of riding I do (6 to 12 hours a week) results in weight loss and added fitness. 50% of the time, it works every time. I joke, this always works for me.

Even though this lifestyle works for me, I am not without questions:

#1 How the hell does a medicine prevent weight loss? I mean if you take in 2100 calories a day (to survive) and ride 2 hours plus burning 2000+ calories, how do you NOT lose weight? The body is no doubt burning the calories, even if the metabolism process is slowed in some way by a medicine, why does the simple math of burning more than you are taking in not apply? What is the body running on if not calories (no matter WHAT the source)?? Strange.

#2 What is it about my metabolism vs. others that allows me to eat a diet that is about 60% carbohydrates and lose weight, but if I cut the carbs out and eat a good fat and protein (Paleo like) I gain weight? Again I say-- strange.

I know that one reason this works for me is that using the Daily Plate helps me keep track of portions and calorie intake and that is key for a food lover like me. Earlier this week I made up packet of meats in 1 serving packets (example: 4 oz. of lean ground turkey) and chucked them in the freezer to use as needed. Now I know the exact amount I'm taking in. Not saying I don't eat 2 servings with some recipes, but seeing what 2 servings is compared to what I thought was a serving is eye opening. I also measure out my pasta and rice servings so as not to make more than I need, 'cause I'm the type that if it's there I WILL eat it. Does it take a few extra minutes? Yeah, but not THAT much extra time and I feel it's worth it for me.

I am amazed at how easy it is to get off track with eating (cheese, bacon, sausage, etc.,....BACON???) well and drinking too much ("oh yeah, it's Tuesday! Time for some beers!" Followed by "Oh yeah, it's Thursday... Friday... Saturday... Sunday....). I was shocked when I went back and looked at some old dietary files from way back in 2007 and saw that I have slowly gained 30 pounds since 2007. YIKES!!!

It feels good to be back and doing what I know works for me and to the routine of this sort of eating and drinking. It feels good to be in control and knowing that I have less than 30 pound to lose to get where I want to be, and that is better than having the 130 pounds to lose when I was 21. Online estimates show that I should be where I want to be by February or March. Sweet, just in time for the 2012 race season!

Later.

Ride Pics

The gusting 35 mph + winds of the past two days finally subsided and after spending yesterday doing an indoor workout I headed out to the gravel and dirt roads. Felt good to get outside. First ride since Saturday. Couple pics from the day....

Rural road debris. Beats broken glass in the city any day if you ask me.

Veggies to the left, meat husks to the right. Your choice.

Nothing runs like a Deere

Something about this cow made me think it was fake.
Like there was a couple dudes inside it or something.

That's all I got.

Later.

The Weekend

I may or may not have mentioned and you may or may not care (I would bet you don't, since I barely do), I chose to skip the Peak To Peak XC race. The whole "might be a third DVT" scare had me not really caring about racing, and since I didn't pre register, I was out no cash. I am opting to do the Lowell 50 gravel race at the end of the month instead. After that it's the Iceman and then the season is over. Fin. Kaput.

I did get out for a nice 21 mile ride at MMCC yesterday. Did some nice tempo stuff and took the time on one lap to do some filming, just 'cause I like to keep the creative juices flowing. I need to do that every so often.

The ride was super fun and with the 35 mph winds I was stoked to be IN the woods instead of OUT on the dirt roads. Once home it was time to chill, have a few beverages and then we headed out to dinner at our friends home for some AMAZING steaks on the grill. Just, freaking amazing!!

Today I could have rode, should have rode, but I found myself getting caught up in some XXC Magazine work and some blog posts on xxcmag.com. Then it was too late and B-Man had a soccer match later which I didn't want to miss, since he is a defensive wunderkind, ha!

On a "training" note (keep in mind I don't train, I ride and see what happens when I race), I have really been enjoying my new hear rate monitor. I just went with a basic Polar FT7, not the greatest, but it gets the job done. But I have to say the Flowlink data transfer unit is pretty sweet. Jut lay the watch on the pad, it launches the software, downloads you data and there it is. I like that. I would prefer that the watch showed time in each zone, but it doesn't, but it shows more and works better than my last HR monitor and that is fine by me. My goal for using the monitor is more to keep track of time, calories and average heart rates so that is all good.

This coming week looks to suck for getting and good riding in: work, B-Man at the dentist, me at the doctor and then the eye doctor. I'm gonna have to be creative with the calorie burning this week. Not that it matters as it seems not matter WHAT I do, or what I eat my weight NEVER budges. It has been XXX.4 EVERY time I weighed myself this week. F it.

Later.

No Ride Thursday

I didn't ride today, so I am using a pic from yesterday for no other reason that "just 'cause." I was sort of busy today so I squeezed in an hour indoor workout to burn some calories, and called it a day. Still having/will have a good week ride time wise, so I wasn't too bummed.

Been thinking a lot about a few bikes lately, but also about some gear I need before the cold weather riding season gets here. Pretty sure I am going to go with some Moose Mitts (hand made here in Michigan) this winter. I've heard some really good things about them and since my hands and feet take the worst of it during cold weather rides so they are on my A List of things I need/want. Pretty certain I will go with the flat bar model since I almost always ride my mountain bike during the winter rather than my road or cross bike. After that I think I need to update from my old Lake winter boots to something better if possible.

Also not racing this weekend. Gonna save my pennies for now. Do a gravel race at the end of the month and then most likely finish with the Iceman in November.

More on the bikes and winter crap later, I spent too much time ranting about social media earlier and now have used up all my me time.

Later.

A Lack Of Interaction

I have made well over 2,000 posts to this blog, all but a handful were pretty lame (including this one). It's been so long (since 2005) I have trouble remember why I even thought it was a good idea to start it. I guess I always liked the idea of keeping a journal, but keeping a hand written journal just for myself seemed a bit too failed art student turned book worm, turned manifesto, turned FBI's Most Wanted for me. Plus I like bikes and wanted to focus on my life riding and racing them. So The Soiled Chamois was born. For that I apologize.

Over the years I have talked way more openly about my failed bike racing, life, and personal stuff than a man should outside of his family and therapist. But was done is done and I (probably) wouldn't change anything. From time to time I think about stopping the blog, but to tell you the truth, it gives me an excuse to write, maybe make you laugh, vent to the WWW instead of loved ones, and get some thoughts down. Some of which sort of helps when it comes time for me to write for my day/night job.

As you can tell from my writing, I am not a smart man (thank God for my proofer when I write for XXC Mag!), I barely graduated high school and went to art school 'cause art/design was all I knew how to even vaguely do. But I have always loved to write. I just don't use correct grammar or spelling. Again, I apologize for that.

What I have noticed recently is that blogs just don't get the readers they once did. I'm not sure this site EVER got readers and that's fine by me, it's just an observation. It's also apparent that most folks would rather write/read a sentence or less on Facebook or Twitter and move on. The attention span of the world has become microscopic. Again, I am OK with that. I myself post random crap and what not via social media outlets both as myself and for XXC Magazine and I enjoy it to an extent. As far as XXC I like to inform readers about races, events, news, let them know about new merchandise and xxcmag.com blog updates.

As far as myself, I try to keep any sharing I do to some images from rides, checking in with friends far away, and random silliness and absurdities. I'm not one to share EVERY SINGLE THING I do: "Getting coffee," "Eating at Pizza Planet," "Taking a shit," etc., Or better yet the ones that share every life drama and grievance they have. Then again why did I mention the things I do on this blog?

I'm also not like those political nuts (both left and right) who feel the need to post everything from why the dung beetle needs saved to every Fox News like rumor about how President Obama was born from Socialist aliens, is actually a former Black Panther turned Cold War era Russian spy who has had plastic surgery and was elected by the "liberal media" to undermine the country from within. But then again I have refused to vote since the Bush/Gore sham election and have no plans to vote again in this life or the next.

It's not the whole social media thing that bothers me, most of it is just goofin' off and time wasting, I guess it's pretty much the lack of human interaction that people have nowadays (and for someone like ME to notice, it must be bad, as I am not exactly a social butterfly).

Example: Today I took B-Man to Bob's Barber Shop to get his hair cut. I love Bob's. It's less than a block from my house, there are deer heads and stuffed fish all over the place, they talk with their customers, know everything that's going on in town, do a great hair cut, and will even trim your nose and ear hair (not that I have any!!).

The best thing though is that they know you when you walk in. Today I walked in with B-man and the first thing the dude says is "Hey, how you doin'? How's the magazine going?" That was pretty cool.

So B. is getting his cut, I talk a bit with the barber, etc. There were three other customers in the shop, all three had their heads down, phones out, texting, "updating" and browsing away. Not one word was uttered by any of them the ENTIRE time. Hell for all I know they were all texting each other!

Believe me I am sort of a social curmudgeon, and find it way easier to email someone than I do to call them (most of that is due to the fact that I can be sort of "backwards" talking to some folks on the phone and usually say something stupid or forget my own name or something). I have also run into blog and web friends a few times and really didn't know what to say to them in person, even though we have e mailed and blogged to each other tons of times. Sad.

So what is this rant all about? Hmm.... It seems it has nothing to do with bikes at ALLLL. But I will break it down for you in case you have skimmed ahead:

• God knows why, but me and that lady with all the cats are still blogging.

• I'm not all that smart.

• Bob's Barber Shop rocks.

• People are WAY to freaking obsessed with their phones.

• I'm sort of a slack jawed yokel.

OK, I'm done. Now I gotta go update my status.

Later.

An 80/20

Most of my rides are either on dirt and gravel roads with a few short stretches of pavement attached or mountain bike rides on singletrack. But today I went with an 80/20. 80% road and only 20% gravel. Usually if I'm on my cross bike it's about 95% dirt roads. But today I just felt like not thinking and pedaling a tad easier, so the 80/20 made an appearance.


Lucky (I guess?) for me, most of the paved roads outside of town are pretty rough so a cross bike is still a fine choice for the job. As much as I hate to get rid of it, I think I might have to look into parting with my road bike at some point. Right now it just sits on my trainer. That's no life for a great bike. But I doubt I will since I'm sort of a bike hoarder.

95%, 10%, 80%, whatever. It's just always nice to be on the bike. Road (if you must), dirt, gravel, etc., Bikes are pretty swell.

Later.

Pretty Darn Not Bad

Before I get to bike stuff, I am happy to say that the pain in my calf from the "almost a DVT" that I have is about gone. The slight increase in the meds has finally started helping it and I am pain free. That was scary. Now I just to be a bit more vigilant on making sure I keep up with the blood tests, dosage and make sure I wear my compression socks when traveling to and from races. It's also a good idea that I starting re hydrating post race. I tend to hydrate before and after a race or long ride, but somehow never make sure I RE-hydrated AFTER the race. Thick, dehydrated blood is not good when you're in the car 2+ hours after a race and prone to blood clots. OK, on to important stuff....

Took yesterday off the bike, felt good. Today it was back on the CX bike for nearly 3 hours of gravel. Legs felt good for most of it, but I tell you what, I have a knack for finding the fresh dirt roads. On one road, I was on a slight uphill and went from 17 mph to 7 in about a second. All good though, it just made that "slight uphill" more of an actual hill. I love days where I can get a ride in that burns more calories than my BMR. Now if I can just not binge eat/drink like a depraved beast I might actually start RE-loosing the weight that I gained back over the summer. Who GAINS weight over the summer?? I'm suck an idiot.

For better or worse (I'll let you decide) I always take my camera on my rides. 95% of the time I roll, point and shoot. If I get a shot great, if I don't no big deal. I only took a few shots today and today I gotta say I pretty much got nothing. Not sure what the hell I was pointing at???

Bunch of hunks of tree tops. In their own way, they do capture the color and "fallness" of the day, but I by no means too proud of them. Ha!

Then one of the only one that SORTA came out was the one below of a nice road sections. This road has repaved recently and is ssmmmmmooooooooth. If seems to go on forever too. Just roller, after roller, after roller. It goes on way further than my camera can pick up. Too bad I am only on it for just about a mile before I turn back onto dirt.

I was also able to get some work done on XXC today and there are few more blog posts up on the site too that cover Iron Cross, Rod d'Azur, and a lot of other endurance time wasting. Check it out!

Still not sure if I am racing the Peak 2 Peak this weekend or not. I was going to, but haven't registered. Then with the whole leg thing, I might just hold off on racing until the Lowell 50 gravel race at the end of the month. But I might... I'd really hate to have to rely on the Iceman to be my last mountain bike race of the year.

Later.

More Than It Should Have

Went for a short spin on the gravel roads today just to burn some calories and it hurt a bit more than it should have.

The legs weren't bad, it was the fact that I ate eggs and bacon (mmmm.... bacon), putzed around for a few minutes, filled my bottles and left. What was I thinking? I'm 40 freaking years old with the digestive system of a 90 year old. I pedaled about 5 miles before I started vurping up warm bacon juice all over my legs (D-POW style). Not fun.

After a while I got used to the hot back infused lava that was coming up my throat and just tried to enjoy the ride and the perfect Indian summer we're having.

Insert joke about perverted cyclist
stumbling upon herd of sheep here.

Amidst the heat of the day the agricultural phallus
rose to meet the warmth of the sun and with it deliver the...
DEAR GOD, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME???

Oh well, a pretty sweet week of riding, with double digits of ride time (always a bonus for shlep like me).

I need to go take some Tums.

Later.

Hanson Manson

Took me and my achy (but NOT clotted) leg up to Hanson Hills to throw down some miles on Saturday. Did the Outer, the Inner, and an Outer with an Inner attached for 30 miles. The trails were perfect.

The day off the bike Friday and the mental weight lifted by my doctor really had the legs feeling good and made for a fun time on the trails. I ran into about 6 other riders at various points on the trails. Funny that at least half of them were helmetless. WTF? I could really care less if they crash and bash their head, if they're that stupid, it's not my fault. What I fear is something like that happens and lawsuits happen and threaten the trails system. Maybe I think too much, I just don't understand why someone would mountain bike without a helmet. Strange.

Time to squeeze a quick dirt road ride in before B-Man's soccer game today.

Later.

Makin' Hay

Thank Sweet Baby J! NO CLOT!

Well, not yet.

According to the Doppler there is some blood thickening and fixin' to clot where an old clot was, but blood is still flowing, so I just need to up some medicine and hope for the best. They also bled me dry and took 8 valves of blood to re-test me for coagulation issues that I might be prone to. Not the greatest way to spend a Friday, but it's still some good(ish) news. Plus the Doppler chick was sort of hot and the gel was nice and warm on my leg. Not too bad. I kid. I'm a kidder.

Time to make some hay while the sun's still shining.

Later.

Getting Ready For It

I'm not one to slack off too much with the work I need to do with the mag, but I am in between a couple things, waiting for a couple things, and need a couple things in order to do what I need to do right now. So I spent a guilt free 2 hours in the woods on the Spearfish today.

There was some color out there on Tuesday, but today there was even more and fall REALLY threw up all over the trails! Lots of fresh leaves down. Hell we haven't even had our first frost yet!

For the most part I just hammered out the 21.5 and headed home, only stopping once to pee and take these pics. Chased some turkeys, got spooked by a few deer x-ing out in front of me, and enjoyed the ride.

These past three days were great, but they will most likely be the end of my riding for the week and maybe into the weekend. You may or not have read the other day when I mentioned that my calf hurt a bit, well it continues to hurt "a little bit" every so often. Nothing major, no swelling, etc., But I am pretty certain it is another DVT (possibly my third). I just sort of know the ache. So off to the doctor tomorrow at 8:30 a.m., where I fully expect to spend my day going from office, to office to hospital to home, and end the night injecting myself in the belly with Lovenox.

ORRRRRRRRR!!!!

I will be wrong (FOR ONCE!!) about this, and they'll see nothing, send me home and I will have a chillaxing Friday and plan weekend of riding.

I am not counting on it.

Later.

Soft

We have been having some amazing fall weather here (the calm before 5 months storm most likely) but I am not going to waste too much time.

Got out for brunch today on the Jake for a couple hours. Lots of fresh soft dirt roads (Holy sink!), but perfect temps and bright blue sky. Twas fun.

Something is fattening itself up for the coming winter. Yikes. I saved you the views of the torso. Dear God, something picked a deer clean to the bone. Nuts.

I can't say I have ever seen a piece of equipment
this color before. It's not ghetto, it's custom.

This lot was filled. I had to park on the road.

I took delivery of a heart rate monitor today. I haven't used one in years (other than on the trainer), but I want to get back to tracking some stuff. Maybe kick my mid packness up to upper mid pack in 2012 (and drop somewhere between 5 and 30 pounds). Generally I am against the HR monitor, but it can be too easy to just putz when I get out on the dirt roads. Since there isn't much climbing I need to start making sure I am burning calories and gaining fitness not JUST putzing. There will always be SOME putzing, putzing is the main ingredient in me being a putz. And you thought I couldn't work the word putz/ing in more than 5 times.

Later.

P.S: I'm working on that technique Gnat! LOL!

And Now For Something Else

I needed this.

Funk, you are not match for the power of singletrack.

Now more blathering....

When you suck at bike racing like myself, often times you need to dig deep, reach way down and turn yourself inside out... in the attempt to find a positive spin on a poor performance. I have done just that.

As previously discussed; Saturday at the Grampian Challenge I finished in a dismal 31st place in the 38 man expert class. BUT upon further examination and some digging I have come up with this--

Out of the 142 folks that raced the 40 mile race I came in 49th. See, I like that better. I can sleep better knowing that 93 folks finished behind me rather than just seven. OK, that's a lie, I still won't sleep tonight, but at least it will have nothing to do with sucking at bike racing.

There is no word on how many of the 93 folks behind me had mechanicals, were injured, handicapped, blind, got lost, were abducted, quit or were stoned out of their minds.

Later.

Passing The Time, Waiting For Keys

I've been in a mood. One of those inexplicable funks that I get in and for better or worse (mostly worse) every so often. It really has nothing to do with riding my bike (probably more to do with NOT riding my bike) and it has nothing to do with Wifey or B-Man. Not even really sure it has to do with work, other than that in between issues there is a lull in my work load that gives me too much time to think about stuff.

Also, I think I have a twinge in my right calf from the race on Saturday (pushing hard in the mud with a new cleat placement and a hike a bike or two), it's not pain, it's twinge. Big deal, right? Well the last time(s) I thought this I ended up in the hospital with a DVT. Granted those times it hurt worse, but as you can imagine a "twinge" is enough to bring back thoughts of giving myself shots in the belly, hospitals, or worse. F.

So as I type this I am COMPLETELY dressed to go for my brunch time ride up at the college. But I can go nowhere, because Wifey has managed to take both sets of keys with her again. I was just going to head out on the gravel, but she's on her way home with them now, so I might as well wait. WIFEY!!!!!

Man, I need this ride to be good.

Later.

Couple Things

I could lament more about yesterday's cold, wet, muddy, suck fest at the Grampian Challenge, but I won't. F*ck it, it's just bike racin'. (BTW, when I say "suckfest," I of course mean ME, not the race, the race was great. The best thing about the race, was that this is just year ONE for the race, it can only get better. Next year I long for more single track OR to combine the race with the Ronde Van Stony!! Oh snap, that would rock. It could be epic. OK, I'll stop. Whatever a great way to ride new gravel roads and new (to me) singletrack.

Having said all that crap, I will say and I will post these pics and I will get crude, 'cause that's sort of what I do. (We all have our callings. Sadly all my calling make me look like an immature idiot and make me no money whatsoever. I hate my life. Really, it needs to change).

You know, it wasn't the muddy race course that pissed me off yesterday, that's racin'; it was the muddy parking lot that put the hurt on my Adidas Gazelles whilst I changed. Curse you vile mud! You know they are made of suede. SUEDE!!

PUBIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: Oh yeah, Never drop your undies in the mud as you dress after the race, 'cause A. they will be wet, dirty and nasty. B. they will look like you shit yourself and force you to freeball it for the drive home. No big deal to me; I dig the air and the freedom, but I'm pretty sure the McDonald's staff sensed my free-swingingness when I stopped on the way home. To them I say "Don't judge me, and hurry the f*ck up with my Mc-F*cking Chickens, I'm starving here!!!"

This is my bike and number plate post race (yes, that IS a glimmer of sun). I have feeling there is some (not so) witty, crude, comment about my number being 96 and not 69, but for the life of me in my current inebriated state (not to be confused with yesterday's, tomorrow's or next week's inebriated state.) I can't come up with it.

I used my Salsa Ti El Mariachi. What a great freaking bike. I love this bike. Too bad my shifting was all jacked up. I think I need some new cables. Conditions were not the best so I don't want to judge (I'm not judging, I'm "just sayin'"). But what a great bike. I love it. But then again I love ALL my bikes, especially the one I'm on.

Did you know I saw a camel during yesterday's race. For realz. Somebody had a f*cking camel. A big ass, humped back (BACK!), SHOULD be living in the f*cking desert and NOT cold ass Michigan camel. Strange.


Burrs. I hate 'em. Especially when they stick around (OHHHH! Get it?? Stick around?? Get it? Burrs...) after a crash. These fellas joined me at about mile 4 when I ate mud in a corner and then they hung on for 35 more miles, adding 12 grams to my 200 pound body. THIS is why I finished 31 out of 38 experts. It's a conspiracy! I have NO doubt. I blame the burrs. And right wing, conservative America (of course) for this. F*cking twats.

Did I mention yesterday that I'm pretty sure the only reason I race these days is to enjoy a $1 McChicken (Or 3, YES, I ate three, get off my f*cking back) on the way home? They are the BEST!! And when you hit the spot with the big, giant gob of mayo... Oh sweet Jezzzus, it lights up my loins like no other!! I'm pretty sure that Ronald McDonald and crack whore pimps are one in the same.

I gotta go make dinner and fill my gut now.

Oh wait I forgot this...

My friend Craig from the UK (someone I met several years ago merely by asking about a bike review on a website), is the man behind Onix Bikes. It seems as much as I hated my old job at the f*cking Tribune-suck my-b*lls-Review he hated his job (also in the printing industry), said "f*ck it" and started his own business (like someone else I know). Things are going well (at least for him) and recently Onix did up a promo video and Craig shared it with me (Thanks!). Take a look... not only at the amazing riding but his company as well. Life gives you a kettle full of shit. Make lemonade, right?



So if you're into the whole road bike thing, and want a fine ride I urge you to be in touch with him. For now, I am just going to enjoy this clip. I have a weak spot for cycling videos.

Later.

Grampian Challenge Race Report Part I

I call this race report on the Grampian Challenge, "Part I," not because of how long the report is, but because it's been a long day: up at 5 a.m., drive 2:30 race 2:45, drive 2:30, family stuff, etc., etc., So for now, I will be brief.

The Grampian was 78% gravel road, 10% singletrack and 10% doubletrack and 2% me praying for an untimely heart attack or something. (That may be a bit strong).

I sucked ass today. Like big, hairy, shirtless,, fat, perv guy in the park ass. It was cold, very blustery, wet, super muddy and I had super dead legs. The gun went off, the Expert class took off and I pedaled like I had weights (beyond my gut) strapped to me. I waved bye-bye to them and rode most of the race solo or with folks who I was in no way working with due to me not being as fast as them, or them not as fast as me. It was not good.

Sure, I have excuses beyond my lack of talent and fitness: stressful week as a solo dad with Wifey in D.C., lack of sleep, no riding this week due to weather and time, not properly hydrated, etc., But in the end it was just a bad race for me. I can deal with that.

The race as 40 miles long (39ish really), my legs came around about mile 25 and left about mile 35. There were some amazing parts; the last section of singletrack in Addison Oaks was great, some of the gravel was kick ass, and with the exception of one section of course where they marked the course with tap ACROSS the trails (WTF?), it was well marked and easy to follow.

The course was also WAY hillier than I expected, especially after having just raced down that way last weekend. The gravel roads had me wishing for my cross bike, but the single track had me thanking God I didn't try to race it!

Not sure how I did overall, but in the Expert Men Open I finished 31st out of 38 in time of 2:46 something. YIKES! I find it hard to believe that 7 other dudes sucked more than me today. Yikes again! 'Cuase I SUCKED.

I ran into my friend Juan from the Cleveland-ish area. I first met him at the Stony Creek 6 Hour way back in the Spring. He's a good dude and one of those folks that you talk to and leave feeling better about life and stuff, he just has a good energy about himself. I like it. Nice seeing you Juan!

Well, well.. this report went longer than expected. I guess this will be it, no need for part II... barring updating with some pics later. BTW, the kicker was to drive back home to find the weather sunny, less windy and not a cloud in the sky here in M.P.. Nice. Real nice.

Later.